Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Advantages to Marrying an Indonesian Woman

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • #31
    Originally posted by Jaime C View Post
    And the white lady part, I think.
    And single, too?

    Is jealous the part that is up for debate?

    Comment


    • #32
      Originally posted by PhilippeD View Post
      From all that you mention, the only thing that apply to my wife who happen to be indonesian is the last one "Easy for Certain Expatriates to Marry". The reason is she HATE the idea of being submmissive to her husband and the idea to be "jailed" at home with the kid and taking care of the house.

      There is plenty of religious freak in the US who share the same value that you applied to indonesian

      At the exception of finding the right girll for you and it happen that she is of X nationality... Have quite less to do the whole population of a country.
      What make you like indonesia (if you do) can be a total turn off for other.

      Advantage? We can not even buy a land in indo!
      This type of woman seems fairly typical in the United States, at least at a certain age before the biological clock starts ticking loudly enough, but the minority in Indonesia.

      Comment


      • #33
        Originally posted by Missnaughty View Post
        Aah... We are toothbrush now.. But I assure you this very secondhand toothbrush (if the owner release me of course), will have more fans than any new toothbrush in market. ;-)

        You can apply the toothbrush analogy to men as well if you want to.

        *Thank goodness I am not your wife ��
        I never offered, and I'm taken.

        Comment


        • #34
          Originally posted by LinkH View Post
          Yes, we both were.
          Since you like making assumptions (old white cat lady yadda yadda), let me make another assumption: your post makes you look like some western guy who was still a virgin before marriage because he couldn't get any where he comes from and who came to a country where he could use his relative wealth advantage to get a gullible girl that doesn't know any better. And now you're on your high misogynist horse feeling like a million buck.

          Your post is not only very generalising, it's also highly insulting to Indonesian women as well as women in general.

          You also seem to confuse your so called "traditional" values with patriarchal values which "traditionally" only serve men.

          Comment


          • #35
            Originally posted by El_Goretto View Post
            Since you like making assumptions (old white cat lady yadda yadda), let me make another assumption: your post makes you look like some western guy who was still a virgin before marriage because he couldn't get any where he comes from and who came to a country where he could use his relative wealth advantage to get a gullible girl that doesn't know any better. And now you're on your high misogynist horse feeling like a million buck.
            I was a virgin on purpose, and I could have slept around if I'd have pursued opportunities to do so. I didn't go to Indonesia to use my 'relative wealth' to find a girl. I took a job there, moved on to another one. I was in my 20's and had always wanted to marry, and I met the right person and married her. I didn't trick her into marrying me. She has 'traditional' values, too.

            Most societies have been patriarchal throughout history throughout the world. There are some exceptions. Padang culture, for example, has strong matriarchal tendencies, mitigated a bit by Islam. But generally, societies become patriarchal. The past 50 to 100 years has been an exception in the west. Patriarchy is not a bad thing. It's a natural and normal thing. And it's not a bad thing for women if men are good protectors, providers. Back when most men did work like digging ditches and working behind a yoke of oxen, there wasn't much motivation for feminism.
            Last edited by LinkH; 20-07-15, 19:04.

            Comment


            • #36
              Originally posted by LinkH View Post
              And single, too?

              Is jealous the part that is up for debate?
              Not single - I've been married since 1982 to an amazing guy.

              Not jealous - I believe in that noxious feminist ideal of "sisterhood," which means I encourage and support women to follow their dreams, regardless of nationality. Actually I think most Indonesian women are terrific, at least the ones I've known. I'm sure there are a few losers, just as there are losers of any nationality and gender you might want to discuss.

              Comment


              • #37
                Puspawarna, You think most Indonesian women you met are great. But, while my OP may have been admittedly an overgeneralization, there was a lot of truth to it as to how Indonesian women are. They aren't all depressed doormats who don't have original thoughts and ideas. They can be very proactive. But yet, in general, they tend to value taking care of the home, think women should cook and keep the house clean, and in general believe that wives are supposed to submit to their husbands (especially since 90+% of the population subscribes to one of the religions that teaches this.)

                The majority likely fit the description in my OP, but they aren't losers, either. So maybe you shouldn't consider the stuff I mentioned as being negative characteristics.

                Comment


                • #38
                  Originally posted by El_Goretto View Post
                  Since you like making assumptions ([SIZE=3]old[/SIZE] white cat lady yadda yadda)
                  Hey! I resemble that remark.

                  Comment


                  • #39
                    Originally posted by El_Goretto View Post
                    Your post is not only very generalising, it's also highly insulting to Indonesian women as well as women in general.[/quote]

                    Maybe to ethnocentric feminists. One of the great things about a lot of Indonesian women is that they wouldn't get bent out of shape if my post were translated and read to them, or if they didn't like it, it wouldn't bother them as much as an ethnocentric westerner who'd embraced feminist philosophy.

                    Comment


                    • #40
                      Puspawarna, well it sounds like you are happy being married. I'm glad to hear it.

                      Comment


                      • #41
                        Man, aren't you tired of talking about these stereotypes about Indonesian women? And what's with 'Believing in Submitting to Their Husband' as one of the advantages? So you marry an Indonesian woman to be your submissive and homemaker? As an Indonesian woman, I find this kind of insulting.

                        You meet a girl, you fall in love, you marry her because you love her, regardless her nationality. End of discussion.
                        Cheers,

                        Princess Consuela Bananahammock

                        Comment


                        • #42
                          Originally posted by LinkH View Post
                          One of the great things about a lot of Indonesian women is that they wouldn't get bent out of shape if my post were translated and read to them, or if they didn't like it, it wouldn't bother them as much as an ethnocentric westerner who'd embraced feminist philosophy.
                          Hi LinkH,

                          I've read your OP and was alarmed by the fact that I could not recognize my (indonesian) wife in it. Nor I could recognize any of our our numerous female Indonesian friends married to either Indonesian or foreign husbands. I have asked her to waste a bit of her time to read it (your OP) and to give me her opinion about it.

                          She didn't need to have it translated nor I had to read it to her unlike what you assume in your above post. Fortunately she is both fluent in english and literate. Believe it or not, despite being a female, SHE CAN READ ! I know, I should have perhaps chosen another wife, not well traveled, with little education and who would be barely able to read. Perhaps she would have been closer to the description you give in your OP but, in this case, I doubt that the reason would be her nationality.

                          Honestly I won't report here what she said when she finished to read. Not only my wife is well traveled and literate, she can be also pretty straightforward. She was not "bent out of shape" but believe me it wasn't that nice.

                          Comment


                          • #43
                            Originally posted by LinkH View Post
                            Puspawarna, well it sounds like you are happy being married. I'm glad to hear it.
                            Nice of you to put the woman's needs first in this case, but I think it is important that my husband is happy too.

                            Seriously - if you (and your wife, equally) are happy in YOUR marriage, that's great too. One of the differences between you and me is that I don't start threads that generalize from MY happy marriage. Life is about individuals - not about gender, nationality, religion, or anything else. If you and your Indonesian bride are happy, good for you. If you generalize from your personal experience to characterize all women, all men, all Indonesians, all Westerners...not so good.

                            In other words, the experiences of people who don't fit your stereotype (most forum members!) are just as valid as the experiences of those who do.
                            Last edited by Puspawarna; 20-07-15, 20:15.

                            Comment


                            • #44
                              Link - I am so glad that you got that subservient little Asian virgin who was easy to marry will take care of the home and wont divorce you.

                              The majority of us reading this stereotypical drivel however just simply married the woman we love, the difference between US and YOU is we don't have an Asian wife, or an Indonesian wife, or a Muslim wife we just have a wife. Think about that.

                              Comment


                              • #45
                                What I find weird about the OP is that he puts as an advantage "easy" (read cheaper) to divorce just on the top of the post from all other advantages of being married. I got this weird impression you married someone to get "an easy" divorce just in case it will not work out. But is your marriage about an "easy exit" from relationship or is it about being together in good and bad times. I hope your wife will not read what you wrote in your first post it may upset her somehow.

                                Comment

                                Working...
                                X