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I'm sorry if this comes across the wrong way. I'm at a loss as to how to explain it diplomatically yet accurately. I don't mean to be rude, so please don't anyone get angry. I'm just diplomatically handicapped. 
If every foreigner here listened to his/her local spouse, I'm afraid the vast majority of us would be paying bribes through the nose or sitting on our butts doing nothing. I have seen so many comments like yours, Rich, where the local spouse wants to take the easy way out or give up. Even my wife tends to want the easy way (not a bribe so much as a shortcut) out of problems with the gov't. I'm thankful that my wife doesn't really have an interest in bribes because her father didn't like taking them (reputedly). However, my wife prefers to sit back and wait for things to resolve themselves unless/until I push her for resolution with the gov't. I've heard/seen the same thing from other foreigners and their spouses. I can mostly speak about the Javanese in regards to this phenomenon, but I've heard tell of non-Javanese spouses being the same way (bribe, wait forever or give up). It's not wrong, necessarily, but it is what it is. This is not the West, and we cannot expect things to proceed the way they do back home.
What I am really trying to say here is that Indonesians are trained from a young age to accept the status quo, trust officials (or at least do what they say!) and not cause a problem. It's hammered into them, really, by parents and teachers. It's not a problem to bribe an official - it's just illegal. To reject a bribe request is causing a confrontation, which makes the official lose face and puts the applicant in a weak position (not legally or morally, just when dealing with that official if s/he's particularly single-minded in getting bribes) that can be abused through polite threats, inaction, long delays, etc. I blame it on the school system and the culture but, honestly, it SEEMS as if this sort of problem is fairly common to Asia because of the importance of diplomacy and saving face.
Indonesians generally do NOT like confrontation at all. They'd prefer to prevaricate (equivocate, evade or lie) than to take a problem head-on. I've seen it time after time in my life, and heard about it from others. I can't say they are morally wrong or anything like that because they're actually trying to protect people's reputations, but the end result is rampant corruption.
I'm probably wrong on some of this, but it's my opinion based on my own experiences and the comments of others.
Stick to it, rich. If you give up, you might as well leave the country. I know it's difficult, confusing and frustrating, but have a little patience and diligence, and you'll make it.
Namaste, Peace & Love,
Glenn
If every foreigner here listened to his/her local spouse, I'm afraid the vast majority of us would be paying bribes through the nose or sitting on our butts doing nothing. I have seen so many comments like yours, Rich, where the local spouse wants to take the easy way out or give up. Even my wife tends to want the easy way (not a bribe so much as a shortcut) out of problems with the gov't. I'm thankful that my wife doesn't really have an interest in bribes because her father didn't like taking them (reputedly). However, my wife prefers to sit back and wait for things to resolve themselves unless/until I push her for resolution with the gov't. I've heard/seen the same thing from other foreigners and their spouses. I can mostly speak about the Javanese in regards to this phenomenon, but I've heard tell of non-Javanese spouses being the same way (bribe, wait forever or give up). It's not wrong, necessarily, but it is what it is. This is not the West, and we cannot expect things to proceed the way they do back home.
What I am really trying to say here is that Indonesians are trained from a young age to accept the status quo, trust officials (or at least do what they say!) and not cause a problem. It's hammered into them, really, by parents and teachers. It's not a problem to bribe an official - it's just illegal. To reject a bribe request is causing a confrontation, which makes the official lose face and puts the applicant in a weak position (not legally or morally, just when dealing with that official if s/he's particularly single-minded in getting bribes) that can be abused through polite threats, inaction, long delays, etc. I blame it on the school system and the culture but, honestly, it SEEMS as if this sort of problem is fairly common to Asia because of the importance of diplomacy and saving face.
Indonesians generally do NOT like confrontation at all. They'd prefer to prevaricate (equivocate, evade or lie) than to take a problem head-on. I've seen it time after time in my life, and heard about it from others. I can't say they are morally wrong or anything like that because they're actually trying to protect people's reputations, but the end result is rampant corruption.
I'm probably wrong on some of this, but it's my opinion based on my own experiences and the comments of others.
Stick to it, rich. If you give up, you might as well leave the country. I know it's difficult, confusing and frustrating, but have a little patience and diligence, and you'll make it.
Namaste, Peace & Love,
Glenn
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