Can you be proud of your incapability?

[dramaqween]

So, I've heard this kind of ultra dumb claim such as "I can't do blah blah, and I'm proud of it" so many times. Like when someone can't cook, or is physically sedentary, or is incapable of doing other tasks.
Question is, if you ever said that, did you really proud of your incapability, or just use that as a justification that you were lazy to make a change? Or just to make you sound cool (lel)?

Or when your kid told you hey mum i can't do math and i'm proud of it. Seriously?

[ScooterIndo]

The one I hate is when people you have asked to do something look at you with a big stupid smile and say "Gak berani yaach" It has to be the most idiotic thing a person could ever say.

[sand86id]

Well, i've never encountered people that are proud or even brag about their own incapabilities. What I do know is that we shouldnt feel (or make people feel) discouraged about it either.

[naughtygab]

i have some female friends who are proud to say " i cant cook, i cant even differentiate coriander leaf and parsley. i dont know the differences between garlic and shallots ( bawang putih and bawang merah) etc" i once asked them , why are you proud of not being able to cook? .. they said, it shows the people that i am not like my mother who knows how to cook and to cook only ( sad isnt it? to see their mother as their cook only) , means that i am a trendy working woman who never have the time to learn to cook ..

another brag thing that i saw and it 'wow' me in a negative way is an indonesian family, living in Indonesia, with a daughter, she studied in an international school. and although she's top of the class, she claim that she cant speak/understand any indonesian word.her mom is so proud to say , my daughter even tho she is born in jakarta, raised in jakarta, but she cant speak indonesian. she only speaks english. I must have raised her well . i asked her, so, even you live in jakarta, but you cant speak bahasa at all?? , proudly she shook her head, " no" , i asked again" you cant even buy a teh botol if you are thirsty?" .. she said " no..., plus i wont go to any other countries that doesnt speak english. i only want to go to USA.. no japan, no korea, no france... "

am blown away!. i know a lot of foreigners who push themselves to learn bahasa, i know some indonesian go to other languages course to make them know other languages so seeing this family who limit themselves with english .. and refuse to use bahasa while they live here.. ...

[Chilled.]

I cant remember the phrase, but its an actual thing. Showing off that you do NOT have to do something (as oppose is not capable of).

hmmm lemme search....

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conspicuous_leisure
3rd paragraph is as quoted

Veblen defines leisure as the non productive consumption of time. The wealthy consume time unproductively due to a disgust of menial labor but also as evidence of their pecuniary ability to live idle lives. BLA BLA BLA.... Objects or trophies or knowledge that has no real-world application are all examples of the things that the wealthy use to demonstrate their wealth and their leisure. Displaying rules of etiquette and breeding, and formal and ceremonial observances are other demonstrations of unproductive (and therefore leisurely) uses of time.

It is also not enough for the leisure class to live a life of idleness, their servants must also engage in the performance of leisure despite their position as hired help. They are given uniforms, spacious quarters and other material items that signal the wealth of their employer: the more lavish the servants' dress and quarters, the more money the master has to spend freely. This is an example of "conspicuous consumption," a form of conspicuous leisure. House servants give the illusion of "pecuniary decency" to the household, despite the physical discomfort that the leisure class feels at the sight of servants, who produce labor.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conspicuous_consumption
Additional reading resource


So something like this. Not exactly but yea.

[fastpitch17]

When an Indonesian family member tells me I should work (invest) with this business or that, I am proud to say sorry, I can't work in Indonesia.

[Phalange]

In my opinion, why can someone brag about their capability but not their incapability? Incapability is a flaw, and being proud of it means they accept their flaws. I think accepting the flaws is harder than learning to cook. They must have reasons why they don't learn to do so. Maybe they're just lazy, or they don't have a mother to teach them how to cook and they're used to order in, or maybe they don't have a kitchen in their house. Now that they've admitted that they can't cook, people won't ask them to cook for them and won't mock them for their cooking skill. The point is, when someone is proud of their incapability, that means they're not hiding their flaws. They're just being honest to themselves.

I know this might sound silly, but once you see from a different perspective, you would understand why people would say such things.

"Once you've accepted your flaws, no one can use them against you" - Tyrion Lannister

[rabbit_39]

Accepting flaws and being proud of them is different. Accepting flaws means you know you have it and if needed you'll fix it. What we're talking about here is telling people that you can't drive because you've always had a driver. You can't clean the house because you've always had a maid. You don't know how to work the phone (besides playing games) because your Personal Assistant takes all your calls. Typical mentality/mindset here. Flaws are not something to be proud of, lack of abilities that is beneficial to you is something to be fixed. This mindset = "this is Indonesia, just accept it" and never have any growth.

Look at Singapore, Japan, Philippines, Malaysia who in many significant ways are more advanced than Indonesia. Even Vietnam in one significant way have surpassed Indonesia. In 10 years their household electrification ratio went up from 51% to 92.35 (1996 to 2006; Worldbank report). Indonesia is still stuck at 85%. Looking at and observing the people I get to interact with, the above mindset is the root cause of lack of growth. Hesitance to accept change/flaws/criticisms and grow from them.

[dramaqween]

In my opinion, why can someone brag about their capability but not their incapability? Incapability is a flaw, and being proud of it means they accept their flaws. I think accepting the flaws is harder than learning to cook. They must have reasons why they don't learn to do so. Maybe they're just lazy, or they don't have a mother to teach them how to cook and they're used to order in, or maybe they don't have a kitchen in their house. Now that they've admitted that they can't cook, people won't ask them to cook for them and won't mock them for their cooking skill. The point is, when someone is proud of their incapability, that means they're not hiding their flaws. They're just being honest to themselves.

I know this might sound silly, but once you see from a different perspective, you would understand why people would say such things.

Unfortunately bragging, in most cases, has very little to do with acceptance.

And yes it's silly.

[godmachine12]

another brag thing that i saw and it 'wow' me in a negative way is an indonesian family, living in Indonesia, with a daughter, she studied in an international school. and although she's top of the class, she claim that she cant speak/understand any indonesian word.her mom is so proud to say , my daughter even tho she is born in jakarta, raised in jakarta, but she cant speak indonesian. she only speaks english. I must have raised her well . i asked her, so, even you live in jakarta, but you cant speak bahasa at all?? , proudly she shook her head, " no" , i asked again" you cant even buy a teh botol if you are thirsty?" .. she said " no..., plus i wont go to any other countries that doesnt speak english. i only want to go to USA.. no japan, no korea, no france... "

Perfectly good word for that case: pathetic. Goes for the mum as well.

[godmachine12]

The one I hate is when people you have asked to do something look at you with a big stupid smile and say "Gak berani yaach" It has to be the most idiotic thing a person could ever say.

That's when you know to never pay any attention to the person at all, for anything, ever.