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What to do in Jkt after marrying an Indo guy ?

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  • What to do in Jkt after marrying an Indo guy ?

    Hello all,

    After reading so many topics of this forum I finally write one.
    To say it shortly, I'm gonna marry my Indo fiance next year. However he will surely work in Jakarta by the end of the year and for some times (he is now in a third country). So the plan is that I would join him there as he got a very good job opportunity. I guess my problem won't be visas ( social budhaya visa then marriage) but more the question "what will I do there"
    I already almost gave up on finding job (I haven't 5 years of experience yet) so I wonder how you occupy your days (I haven't got kid). Any activities to do as volunteer? Or project to get involved in? I got an engineer degree but doesn't speak indonesian (yet - still learning)
    Thanks in addition for your advices!

  • #2
    You have some hobbies right? My first advice would be study Bahasa to the level where you can go out by yourself and have small chat or buy things ect.

    Are you aware that once you got spouse visa (and I think you will get it as you intend to marry) you cannot work on it?
    I am not 100% sure but being involved in projects or volunteering is some sort of work and you may need some working permit.

    The question I would ask on your place would be how long can you stay unemployed (just in the worst case scenario you know)? Also you mentioned you will be living in Jakarta. Some people don't like Jakarta I am not sure how you will feel personally in that city.

    Not long time ago there was a similar post of foreigner wife who was "bored to death" and getting depressed as she was feeling she is wasting her potential for not having any career in Indonesia.

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    • #3
      There is a lot for trailing spouses to do in Jakarta, but I guess your situation might be a little different than some. Are you planning to stay in Indonesia permanently? That puts things in a different light from someone who can simply treat their Indonesia stay as something of an extended vacation. It sounds like you are fairly young and have most of your career years ahead of you. It would be a shame to let your career options atrophy, only to have Indonesia open up to foreign employment or for your marriage to end 10 years from now.

      Anyway, as the spouse of an Indonesian you are closer to being able to work than spouses of non-Indonesians. The law already says that foreign spouses of Indonesians are allowed to work, its' just that the implementing regulations have never been issued so it's a grey area. Meanwhile it is hard for you to get "real" work outside the informal sector. But you can certainly hope that the law will be clarified in the next few years and you will be able to seek work.

      Meanwhile...In your case I would do everything possible to keep my skills up-to-date. Definitely pursue your bahasa Indonesia studies as that will make you more attractive to employers. If there are any certifications/degrees/courses you can pursue on-line that would enhance your attractiveness to future employers, consider whether you want to do that.

      One "grey area" informal job you might be able to pursue is tutoring - perhaps as an engineer you have the skills to be a math tutor? I am guessing there would be demand for this at all levels and possibly in several languages.

      As far as simply keeping busy, I'm firmly of the opinion that, barring some kind of external problem like financial difficulty, illness, or loss of a loved one, people are about as happy and busy as they want to be. There are a number of organizations in Jakarta for foreign women through which you can volunteer and participate in things like quilting classes, book clubs, etc. There is even an organization that is specifically for foreign women married to Indonesians. If that's not your cup of tea (it's not mine! I run in horror from most women's groups), some of your other options include becoming a docent at the national museum, getting fit, studying a musical instrument, becoming a gourmet Asian chef ... it's really up to you.

      Finally, you obviously shouldn't have kids until you are ready for it. But Indonesia is a lovely place to have children once that's what you want, because it is so easy to get affordable child care help that can really make a difference in terms of how much you enjoy parenting.

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      • #4
        The first year or so you should be fine; although this is not New York or Paris, there is quite a lot to explore and everything will be new. But after that...

        Another issue I see from a very gloomy perspective, is that there is no light at the end of the tunnel -being a two year period or so- since your husband is Indonesian. So what I get from you is that it is not a fixed short term assignment. And with an ambitious spouse with a super job it doesn't look that will change. Not to get you depressed but this is something you will really have to talk with your hubby about; what does he say?

        I don't know what your native tongue is, but that might be another option in the 'grey area' Puspa mentioned; language tutoring. There are different foundations (yayasan) where they can always use additional help. It could be orphanages/schools, animal support, ... Yes, children and animals are always good diversions.
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        • #5
          Hi again,

          First of all thanks for the replies. It’s true that it feels great to hear from people that would understand the situation.
          I guess I should tell you more about us:
          We met in Turkey when I was working there. He was a student then, working part time. Two years later I moved back to my home country (France) after I finished my contract and he stayed there to finish his studies. Now I’m working in France and he will graduate. His part time job is going well and they will send him back to Indonesia with a contract. It’s a very good opportunity because the mission is very interesting.
          I’ll finish my contract in France in july and the plan was to join him in Jakarta.
          Here is the history of our ‘story’.
          I went to Indonesia last year to meet his family. Everything went very well and we are keeping in touch through him. He also came to France 3 times so my family knows him. They really appreciate him too. So no problems with our families and no problem with religion as he is Buddhist, as his family.
          As I said previously I gave up working with a salary in Indo. (3.5 years work experience, not an expert in a domain)
          But I’m keen on volunteering in organizations or tutoring children.
          I began learning Indonesian and will keep it until I can communicate with his family.
          My hobbies are music (I play an instrument here), geocaching, discovering new places, being busy… But I don’t think it would be enough for staying for a few years (around 5?) with a good moral in Jakarta. I’m fully aware of Jakarta’s difficulties so I prepare myself to a difficult adaptation. I lived abroad around 3 years already but this time it looks like a very difficult challenge.
          About work, yes my main concern is how will I deal with the fact that at 30 years old I’m staying unemployed and have no option to work… Difficult after having studied so much.. Same for my family that paid for my studies…
          So do you guys know if with an ikut suami visa we can ‘volunteer’ ? Helping in organizations, tutoring,… What are the informal jobs that I could do with this visa? I guess that if there would be on-line jobs, there would also be difficult to be selected as applicants should be thousands..
          About learning Bahasa indonesia is it possible to register in an Indonesian university? It could be a good way to socialize..
          Thanks again for your replies
          Last edited by Vinchenza; 19-02-16, 19:50.

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          • #6
            About Bahasa Indonesia in Uni:

            http://old.ui.ac.id/en/academic/page/bipa-programs

            Or a doctorate/phd:

            http://www.sci.ui.ac.id/?lang=en#
            Last edited by jstar; 19-02-16, 17:09.
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            • #7
              if you are not looking for job that would pay your bills ( since your hubby has a contract) , you can try to search red nose organization in the internet, you can help tutoring children in need. the money might be zero or close to zero. but it is a good thing to do.
              dont judge a book by it cover. judge it by it price. good books are expensive

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              • #8
                Originally posted by jstar View Post
                Thanks for the link, we will think about living in Depok then

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by naughtygab View Post
                  if you are not looking for job that would pay your bills ( since your hubby has a contract) , you can try to search red nose organization in the internet, you can help tutoring children in need. the money might be zero or close to zero. but it is a good thing to do.
                  Thanks for the link! I don't think I can apply to their 'job' vacancies but I can still propose volunteer hours
                  Thanks I feel less desperate

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                  • #10
                    my wife feels bored too with no friends and no where to go. but she decided to open handicraft online business and selling it at Etsy...Good luck in finding more activities and friends

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by carlanox View Post
                      my wife feels bored too with no friends and no where to go. but she decided to open handicraft online business and selling it at Etsy...Good luck in finding more activities and friends
                      How does she ship her stuff from Indonesia? I'd be worried about the reliability/speed of the service - but it sounds like a great business as long as that kind of detail can be be worked out

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Puspawarna View Post
                        How does she ship her stuff from Indonesia? I'd be worried about the reliability/speed of the service - but it sounds like a great business as long as that kind of detail can be be worked out

                        Register service by pos Indonesia. So far no missing item

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