Marrying in Indoensia, Germany or UK? Need advice!

[Dauthendey]

[COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]Hi everyone,[/FONT][/COLOR]

[COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]I am new here and have registered in this forum because I am looking for advice regarding my relationship with my Indonesian girlfriend.[/FONT][/COLOR]

[COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]I am a German Protestant (but not a strong believer), she is an Indonesian Muslim living in Jakarta. We have met in 2012 when we both did our Master’s in Utrecht, Netherlands. We spent two good years together first living in the same student house then sharing another flat for most of the time. Then in September 2014, she had to go back because her Visa ran out and she couldn’t find any employment in Europe. Since then she found a job in Jakarta and worked for about a year. I came to visit her for two months and later found a job in London myself where I now live. We recently met again in Thailand for a two-week holiday and now really want to put an end to this long-distance relationship. [/FONT][/COLOR]


[COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]At the moment we are thinking about getting her a tourist visa first so she can come and visit me in the UK soon. [/FONT][/COLOR]


[COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]However, we have read that it can be quite difficult for Indonesian’s to even get a tourist visa for the UK. Is that true? If so, what can we do to increase our chances?
From what I have read I see the following problems:[/FONT][/COLOR]

• [COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]My girlfriend is currently unemployed in Indonesia[/FONT][/COLOR]
  
• [COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]Neither her or me have any direct relatives in the UK[/FONT][/COLOR]
  
  
• [COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]We both have limited financial means[/FONT][/COLOR]
  
  
• [COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]I don’t know if and how I can sponsor her as I am not a UK citizen, have little savings, live in a small room in a shared flat, have only been in the country for a few months and am on a temporary work contract.[/FONT][/COLOR]
  

[COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]Also, as this would only be a temporary solution, we are looking at marriage as well. It seems to be quite the task though and that is why I would like to gather some opinions here.[/FONT][/COLOR]

[COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]Would it be easier or more difficult to obtain a marriage visa for her compared to a tourist visa? [/FONT][/COLOR]

[COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]We are still discussing and trying to figure out what country would be best for our marriage. From what I have read it is quite easy to register in the UK while Indonesia and Germany will probably have some additional hurdles. On the other hand those are our home countries and especially her parents are likely to demand a marriage in Indonesia (with me converting to Islam), or at least some kind of religious ceremony (Akad Nikah). And as we want to stay in Europe it is likely we will live in Germany at one point and then need to get our marriage registered there as well.[/FONT][/COLOR]


[COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]Well, we are counting on your opinions to help us find the best way to get back together.[/FONT][/COLOR]

[COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]Thanks![/FONT][/COLOR]

[Kucing_item]

I don't know much about this but it seems like you need a genie in a bottle.

[SmallWorld]

[COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]At the moment we are thinking about getting her a tourist visa first so she can come and visit me in the UK soon. [/FONT][/COLOR]
[COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]However, we have read that it can be quite difficult for Indonesian’s to even get a tourist visa for the UK. Is that true? If so, what can we do to increase our chances?
From what I have read I see the following problems:[/FONT][/COLOR]

• [COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]My girlfriend is currently unemployed in Indonesia[/FONT][/COLOR]
• [COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]Neither her or me have any direct relatives in the UK[/FONT][/COLOR]
• [COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]We both have limited financial means[/FONT][/COLOR]
• [COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]I don’t know if and how I can sponsor her as I am not a UK citizen, have little savings, live in a small room in a shared flat, have only been in the country for a few months and am on a temporary work contract.[/FONT][/COLOR]

[COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]Also, as this would only be a temporary solution, we are looking at marriage as well. It seems to be quite the task though and that is why I would like to gather some opinions here.[/FONT][/COLOR]

[COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]Would it be easier or more difficult to obtain a marriage visa for her compared to a tourist visa? [/FONT][/COLOR]

[COLOR=#000000][FONT=Calibri]We are still discussing and trying to figure out what country would be best for our marriage. From what I have read it is quite easy to register in the UK while Indonesia and Germany will probably have some additional hurdles. On the other hand those are our home countries and especially her parents are likely to demand a marriage in Indonesia (with me converting to Islam), or at least some kind of religious ceremony (Akad Nikah). And as we want to stay in Europe it is likely we will live in Germany at one point and then need to get our marriage registered there as well.[/FONT][/COLOR]

From what you have said, yes it can be difficult to prove her she has got enough funds to support herself while she will visit UK. One of the requirements for standard visitor visa is:

"You should also provide evidence that you can support yourself during your trip, eg bank statements or payslips from the last 6 months."


There is one visa called "Marriage Visitor Visa"

You must prove that you’re:

• 18 or over
• free to give notice of marriage, to marry or enter into a civil partnership in the UK within 6 months of your arrival
• in a genuine relationship
• visiting the UK for less than 6 months
• leaving the UK at the end of your visit
• able to support yourself without working or help from public funds, or that you can be supported and housed by relatives or friends
  
• able to meet the cost of the return or onward journey
• not in transit to a country outside the UK, Ireland, Isle of Man and the Channel Islands
  

To be honest I am very confused about you life plan (UK - Germany). Are you in rush to get marry like is there a baby on the way? It would be more easier to get her visitor visa to Germany then convert it to spouse sponsored visa in Germany (get married) and stay/live in Germany. UK complicates everything not only your and her life but the procedures for visa, costs and other difficulties. Also the advantage of Germany would be your parents can write letter to invite her to stay which would make things more easier. She could stay in Germany study the language, help your parents and you will come (by plane) to see her once for a while until you give up your job in UK.

[ScooterIndo]

Think very carefully before converting to Islam to get married in Indonesia. It may sound easy but it has long term implications for you and your future children.

Really implications like what exactly ???

[Dauthendey]

Thank you for your answers guys!
I know me being in the UK seems to make everything more complicated but I couldn't find a decent job in Germany so that's why I came to London. I am looking for jobs in Germany (and elsewhere) again but for the time being I need to stay here and earn some money. In a way it could also be easier for her to come and live with me in the UK rather than in Germany. She already speaks English, so finding a job here should be easier (once she is allowed to work).

We are in a rush because we are tired of being apart. So no, there is no baby on the way. The only "outside" pressure is from her parents wanting to see her get married soon (according to them its about time). But mostly we just really miss each other and do not want to go through another whole year of separation.

Obviously it would be better to get back together once I am more settled, but it is unpredictable when that will be.

I'm also skeptical about the suggestion to bring her to Germany to stay with my parents while I'm still working in London. I wouldn't be able to see her very often and apart from my parents she wouldn't know anyone in the area either. It will also be hard for her to get away from her parents for a longer time when she is still not married.

I know converting to Islam is a big step and I am not taking it lightly (I would also like to hear more about those implications). I wish there would be a way around it but her parents are very religious and unlikely to leave me any other choice if I want to be with her. The only other option would be to break off with her family but that would have quite a few long term implications as well...

[SmallWorld]

Thank you for your answers guys!
I know me being in the UK seems to make everything more complicated but I couldn't find a decent job in Germany so that's why I came to London. I am looking for jobs in Germany (and elsewhere) again but for the time being I need to stay here and earn some money. In a way it could also be easier for her to come and live with me in the UK rather than in Germany. She already speaks English, so finding a job here should be easier (once she is allowed to work).

We are in a rush because we are tired of being apart. So no, there is no baby on the way. The only "outside" pressure is from her parents wanting to see her get married soon (according to them its about time). But mostly we just really miss each other and do not want to go through another whole year of separation.

Obviously it would be better to get back together once I am more settled, but it is unpredictable when that will be.

I gave you my advice based on similar experience to yours. Remember that speaking English is sometimes not enough to get a job in UK. Is your gf going to work via employment agencies and doing all temporary jobs? Will she be happy with the harshness of some jobs (cleaner, waitress, serving hot dogs in stadiums, selling newspapers)? Unless she is aiming to get some permanent job in the office. Then she needs work permit unless she study then she can work 15 hours per week. Some jobs are really hard and they are tended to be not long time lasting. You said you live in London.... I bet the costs of living there are very high especially accommodation. Unless you want her only to stay at home and not to work but I don't think it will work for her.

[jstar]

Reading this, it seems to me a KUA wedding in Indonesia would be the easiest solution. Don't forget (<30) your girlfriend would need parental approval anyway to have the marriage recognized.

I remember that Germany is one of the few countries which also requests a formal non-impediment for the foreign spouse.

Probably this description can be helpful in your case:

http://www.livinginindonesiaforum.org/showthread.php/35651-German-Non-Muslim-Man-Indonesian-Muslim-Woman-Step-by-Step-Guide