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  • Dating an Indonesian man


    Trying to delete this post lol ... could you please?


  • #2
    Hello Pants,

    Indonesian has come a long way, and there are not many taboo things nowadays. Just enjoy your relationship with him, do what you both like. Just follow the rhythm and blues.

    And yes you are not wrong about the sex part, men are men, and if you are a beautiful European, who could resist. Hey I don't mean to be sexist or rude. So if you don't want to sleep with him, just be honest and tell him that, most Indonesian man are gentleman and very polite too, but don't get me wrong, there are vultures too just like in any part of the world.

    Hope this could help you.

    Cheers,
    B

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    • #3
      I would add to B's post that a relationship with another culture can be beautiful or sad much like it is in any country...it's probably just a little harder to make it work. I've been happily married to an Indonesian lady (protestant) for over 30 years.

      The one thing I would suggest is do not come to Bali with a lot of money or credit cards and be very careful with your financial information. People here are generally honest but most are poor by EU standards and seeing a bag of money, or cards, or access to your bank may be too much of an opportunity to ignore.

      Flores is another island East of Bali....Manggarai just means an area of the island and people generally come to Bali for work as Flores doesn't offer much employment opportunities.
      Flores means flowers as the island is full of flaura and fauna....and well worth if you can persuade your friend to guide you there. There are regular flights from Bali to Labuan Baju or Maumere.
      Flores people are mainly Catholics from the time the island was colonized by Portugal.

      There is an Indonesian expression 'hati, hati'...means be careful or cautious. You should remember that expression on your travels.

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      • #4
        Hmm as for paying, most Indonesian men are very proud, and would like to pay for the girl when going out. But some men could be like expecting the women to pay if she is a foreigner just like Davita says above, they could see you come from EU wich they think you have more money then he could spend, as long as you're fine with it then it's ok i guest. Well why don't you ask him to pay once in a while, you don't always have to pay for him and it's alright with the norm here.

        yeah I've lost my cards a couple of time in the ATM and it sucks, that's why i registered with online banking and could still do transaction on mobile phone when i lost the card., coz I can't get it back till I'm back in my home country when travelling over seas.

        anyway, you'll see soon enough if this guy has genuine feeling towards you or not.

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        • #5
          You should ask your bank if they have online mobile banking apps, I have several bank account, some of them provide an apps to be used on mobile phone, and some you could access their web based system on your phone browsers (unless you are still using Nokia 3210 :P). Sometimes you can't use the online bank apps to buy things directly per se.. but for cases like that where I don't have access to direct cash, I could just transfer the money to a friend, and he could cash it out.

          And I'm also using cryptocurrencies, I have Bitcoin wallet on my mobile that I store small amounts just enough for daily use, well in Indonesia there are still not many stores accept bitcoin, but in any other parts of the world it can be handy.

          And Paypal also could be handy when travelling.

          So are you a frequent visitor to Bali? If you don't mind me asking, is it for business or pleasure? Or both?? lol


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          • #6
            Well yes of course you fell in love with the Archipelago, growing up I've always been fascinated by world history, and this beautiful country full of it and the mystery lurking in every part of the islands.

            You have to visit all of the places in Indonesia, each has their own unique culture and customs, so much to offer if you're the adventurous type of person.

            I'm still curious with Gunung Padang Mystery myself, it is located in West Java. There were a number of archaeological survey carried out, the first one was by the dutch back in the colonial era, and the latest one was ran by Indonesian archaeologists, there are findings that could suggest that the civilization was older than the Egypt.

            And if you're a fan of zomby movies, you should visit Tana Toraja, in South Sulawesi. There is an ancient customs of funeral, where they keep their deceased loved one at home, put on the finest cloth, as if they're still alive and well, every meal time they would bring in food, talked to them etc. They keep doing this until the family has enough money to throw a farewell party it could take up years, because it could cost around $100K even more, they believe the bigger the party, the better it is for their loved one in the after life, and the status of the family will be higher. And here comes the best part, in the old days the deceased WALKED it self to the final resting place which is caves on the sides of a steep ravine. I'll update this post with pics later.

            [spoiler]




            [/spoiler]

            Like I said, Indonesia is a place of legends and mysteries.
            Last edited by black0psrnr; 2 weeks ago. Reason: add pics

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