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  • MyNameIsPants
    started a topic how to make friends in Indonesia

    how to make friends in Indonesia

    Hello people ..
    Im from europe and go in hollidays in Bali and Gili about a month ago ...
    i fall in love for Bali, Indonesia and made few friends who i still chatting with ..
    I chat with a man and few girls ... one of the girls asked me for a perfum from where i come from
    to bring it when i come back in few months ... i said yes ok, so i asked to my other friend (in another city there)
    if she want something from me too perfum, makeup or clothes or other ... we talked a bit then she told me her pay
    was not good then we talked .. and finaly she told me she as no money for food at this time ...
    of course i said i will help her and stuff im not that rich but if i can help with amounts i can afford i will !
    But a question stay in my head, i don't think it is but i want you guys confirm it : Do these girls are friend with me because im a
    tourist and i have more money ?
    Maybe is rude to ask that kind of question but im totaly honest in these relationship i hope is the same for them too ...
    I want to be good with people who need but i don't like to be taking as a dumb also.
    I really want to make real friendship there. Without conditions or interest.. is it possible and how ?

    Sorry for my bad spell not fluent in english.

  • Jhizkawet
    replied
    I guess you still really tooo youngggg to ask this kind of question. Any part of the world will have the same answer...test your friendship!

    if you go make friend with local in here, be aware with your friends attention...is it your interest and safeness or how much many will flow out from your pocket?
    the second girl is straight point make you an ATM machine, all she got to do is telling sad story of her life and get your pity. Straight friend will not do that...trust me!

    and never ever ask any Indonesian if they want gift when you coming back...cause they will! If you want to bring, just bring it do not ask! The one that ask you for perfume...I personally will will cross her out from my friend list.

    make decent friendship...you probably hang out in the wrong place...and there many wrong place here...I hope you found decent friends..I bet it is hard for you since Im "mixed" and already been back for years but still found this problems sometimes.

    Leave a comment:


  • Aditya@27
    replied
    Ok...thanks a lot for the information ☺

    Leave a comment:


  • Miss Cox
    replied
    If you want to be properly friends with someone, do not offer money and do not accept money. That is just common courtesy between friends. Yes, you can take turns paying for the bill when you eat outside, but if you find that you're the one who pays each time, I'd say that's not real friendship. Also I think it's quite rude to accept help or money from a person that you haven't known for at least a year. It says something about their self-respect, too. As an Indonesian woman, even at my lowest I would never ask someone for money. I would rather sell all my things first to provide for myself, before letting someone pay for me. It's a matter of principle and pride, and if someone dares to ask you for your money, or for you to buy them things, when they're not even your girlfriend, then I daresay that they are probably using you. Try not paying for anything for a few months, if they are still around, then you can call them real friends.

    Leave a comment:


  • Aditya@27
    replied
    Hi...☺ U can be my friend. PM please...😊

    Leave a comment:


  • Kipasanginrusak
    replied
    Originally posted by MyNameIsPants View Post
    Thanks guys for your answers !
    The girl who asked me perfums is not the same one who told me she don't have money for food ...
    The first one just found a nice job well payed (i mean for Indonesia lol) i just called her like usualy and in the conversation her sister ask for a french perfum ... so my friend
    ask for it too ... so i told them to send my the brand of perfume i will bring 2 perfums for them.
    The second one told me she has a bad pay but it's ok for her because she like her job (take care of the garden in a small hotel) she told me her earning are less than 2 millions
    monthly ... and she told me these last days she can't buy food and cigarets because her earning too small ... so i told her i will help as i can send money to her bank account
    and she told me i was amazing and all ... I was about to send her a bigger amount but i thinked and i will send her like 500000 roupia and after i will give her good way to make money online
    to make money by herself

    My mum who travel a lot told me : don't talk about money never. Friendship is not about money. I guess is a good advice.
    But she didn't ask you for money, right? She just shared her story with you...
    or did she ask you to give her money? If she did, then you have to be careful, but if she didn't ask you, then it's possibly she just wanted to tell you her condition. Indonesian people like to share their problem to a friend.

    Leave a comment:


  • audilaxen
    replied
    I'd say through the Couchsurfing website or through Meetup website.

    Leave a comment:


  • Pixelmeow
    replied
    Depends where are you located, some cities have areas where expats or foreign traveller hangout with locals. Otherwise, use the internet. Pursue your hobby, join some local communities, and go from there. Or social media.

    Leave a comment:


  • annapham
    replied
    I'm Vietnamese person, but I also want to make friend - Indonesian. How can I make fr with them

    Leave a comment:


  • EmasPH23
    replied
    Hi Everyone,

    Nama saya Emas. Saya tidak bisa bicara Bahasa and I want to learn as we will be assigned to Indonesia in the future for work. I am now very eager to learn Bahasa and would be glad to make some friends and trade my knowledge in exchange for teaching me "formal Bahasa" language. I really do hope that I can make friends here and learn together.

    Looking forward,
    Emas/Female

    Leave a comment:


  • Simicart
    replied
    Ohh, so how much attention we need to put on?
    I think people 's quite nice. Just dont chat chit anything relate money.. I guess

    Leave a comment:


  • iez Cahaya
    replied
    Just Becareful My Friend....😯😯😕

    Leave a comment:


  • syaifulmajid
    replied
    Just be freely talking about then you will know about some of their characteristic, not all of local people ask for money or parfume.
    I met many people here from around the world and first time they just aware about the characteristic but most of them are good persons.
    My opinion is do not wear or use glowing/exposure jewelleries , it can endanger you in public space.

    If need advise from Yogyakarta city, just let me know...


    Here my whatsapp number +6281227848066

    Leave a comment:


  • Jaydm
    replied
    I meet a lot of people on Facebook, just be honest with the person in what you are looking for. If they want to meet up then that's great but no shame if they don't.

    Leave a comment:


  • MyNameIsPants
    replied
    Thanks guys for your answers !
    The girl who asked me perfums is not the same one who told me she don't have money for food ...
    The first one just found a nice job well payed (i mean for Indonesia lol) i just called her like usualy and in the conversation her sister ask for a french perfum ... so my friend
    ask for it too ... so i told them to send my the brand of perfume i will bring 2 perfums for them.
    The second one told me she has a bad pay but it's ok for her because she like her job (take care of the garden in a small hotel) she told me her earning are less than 2 millions
    monthly ... and she told me these last days she can't buy food and cigarets because her earning too small ... so i told her i will help as i can send money to her bank account
    and she told me i was amazing and all ... I was about to send her a bigger amount but i thinked and i will send her like 500000 roupia and after i will give her good way to make money online
    to make money by herself

    My mum who travel a lot told me : don't talk about money never. Friendship is not about money. I guess is a good advice.

    Leave a comment:

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