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Need Advice for friend in very bad situation

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  • Need Advice for friend in very bad situation

    I have written before regarding my friend, a Dutch citizen with an Indonesian husband. She has been asking for a divorce for years but husband won't allow it. She started living a separate life away from him and got pregnant by another man. He knows the child is not his but insists on the being called the father of the child. He still will not grant a divorce. She has accepted that the entire situation seems hopeless. If she pushes him for a divorce he threatens to have her arrested for adultery. Her main worry is she wants her child to go to her family in The Netherlands if anything should happen to her. Can she prepare a document to state the child will go to her family if she dies? If so, should the document be prepared by a lawyer or can it be done by a notary?

    Thanks kindly!

  • #2
    Who is father on the birth certificate of the child? You realize what I'm getting at, right? If it's her current husband, she can write whatever she wants but it will have no value.
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    • #3
      That is a very good point, let me ask her!

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      • #4
        I don't know what you wrote before, but is she still living in Indonesia with her BF and is her BF Indonesian?
        The reason I ask is that some other countries, like Singapore and the U.S., allow one party to initiate divorce unilaterally if the married couple has been separated for a predetermined time period.

        Also, she should check into the consequences of if the husband does inform the authorities that she is in an adulterous relationship. It may be more bark than bite depending on where exactly she is (i.e., Aceh vs. Java).
        "My country is the world, and my religion is to do good." -Thomas Paine.

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        • #5
          The birth certificate is from The Netherlands and no father is listed.

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