View Full Version : Hi girls..have u ever fallin in love with married man ?? pls share
java_girl72
02-07-09, 00:02
Hi gilrs..
pls share with me ..if u ever meet or falling in love with married man before? how is going on ? its cool blink2 or what...???
Hi gilrs..
pls share with me ..if u ever meet or falling in love with married man before? how is going on ? its cool blink2 or what...???
Have you a sister ? is she married ;)
Hi gilrs..
pls share with me ..if u ever meet or falling in love with married man before? how is going on ? its cool blink2 or what...???
No it's not cool, it's a recipe for heartbreak, yours!
Awas sekali mbak, many married guys like to have play toys and it seems like it's a national pastime for those who can afford it here.
No it's not cool, it's a recipe for heartbreak, yours!
Awas sekali mbak, many married guys like to have play toys and it seems like it's a national pastime for those who can afford it here.
Tell me. The bloke who has the shop next to the internet cafe is wanting to take a second wife. He also has a girlfriend.
java_girl72
02-07-09, 19:12
sure ,,but in real is the grass next door more beautifull right?? i know my friend cheating with someone outside ,,but how to telling her about that.,just know each other..friend secret?? upssssss
waarmstrong
02-07-09, 19:44
My goodness, Java Girl, is 72 your IQ? What idiot is going to share their tryst just for your titillation?
A "friend"? Yeah, we've all used that one before...but then we realized at around age 12 that people would know you were talking about yourself...
It usually goes like this:
Girl gets involved with married man.
Girl thinks she's sexier than wife so bloke will stay with her.
Bloke is too scared to leave wife/will loose too much money/is just out for a bonk so stays with wife.
Girl ends up alone and maybe not alone 9 months later.
waarmstrong
03-07-09, 11:28
It usually goes like this:
Girl gets involved with married man.
Girl thinks she's sexier than wife so bloke will stay with her.
Bloke is too scared to leave wife/will loose too much money/is just out for a bonk so stays with wife.
Girl ends up alone and maybe not alone 9 months later.
Add this line, Fred.
"Girl opens thread on Expat Forum seeking validation."
Hi gilrs..
pls share with me ..if u ever meet or falling in love with married man before? how is going on ? its cool blink2 or what...???
i'm have experience with boy that have many ex before, we're just dating not married, and he cheatting me with his colleague, but although i know i have been cheated by him , i still love him, but someday i wake up and understand if i don't use my logic , love will just destroy me, u self that know whether is good or bad , because u not the other people that will do that
Amazing... Are you sisters?
Amazing... Are you sisters?
Or just friends?:rolleyes:
littleiyut
03-07-09, 21:04
Come on girls! Don't you realise all members who has been responded to your posts are male? I keep well away from here, because I never have this adventure so I have nothing to share and I never will.:eek:
Come on girls! Don't you realise all members who has been responded to your posts are male? I keep well away from here, because I never have this adventure so I have nothing to share and I never will.
And i thought you fancied me. :(:o:p:D
littleiyut
04-07-09, 01:33
And i thought you fancied me. :o
Ha...ha... ha...:D Dear Fredo you've made me blush!:o. Perhaps as well my hubby never open this forum:eek:
Sorry I have to erased some of your icons so I can put mine.
Sorry I have to erased some of your icons so I can put mine.
Can't you erase his bouncing fluffball too! :)
Everytime I see a message from Fred, I have to hold on to my flat screen - to stop it jumping off my desk. :rolleyes:
Can't you erase his bouncing fluffball too! :)
Everytime I see a message from Fred, I have to hold on to my flat screen - to stop it jumping off my desk. :rolleyes:
I like jumping sheep. Ask any Yorkshireman, welshman or aussie,
java_girl72
04-07-09, 19:59
no only friend..ups..yes littleiyut agree all commented from man ..maybe i stop share in forum ..btw ,,,thx fred, warmstrong, etc for your share..
no only friend..ups..yes littleiyut agree all commented from man ..maybe i stop share in forum ..btw ,,,thx fred, warmstrong, etc for your share..
All the more reason to take the advice seriously...we know what the game is!
It's a shame that because you didn't hear what you wanted to, you no longer want to share anything, that's the nature of the beast, ask a question and you get a variety of answers, some serious some not, some relevant many not...it's not a counselling service so one needs to take the good with the bad and don't take the sarcasm seriously or personally. :)
Helen_of_Troy
05-07-09, 05:58
I think being in love with a married man is a dead end affair.
Hmmm ...you must put yourself in the wife’s position. How would you feel it you were her?:rolleyes:
I think being in love with a married man is a dead end affair.
Hmmm ...you must put yourself in the wife’s position. How would you feel it you were her?:rolleyes:
REALLY, ask Monica Lewinsky.....So long as he is the President of the USA or his wife that wants to be one! :rolleyes:
Helen_of_Troy
05-07-09, 13:18
You mean a young woman wanted to get ahead (a head, haha, get it) professionally so she got involved with Slick Willy.
Hmmm ..the man inability to keep his pants zipped, because of Bill there was an explosion in Oral Sex:p
Helen_of_Troy
05-07-09, 13:30
Now, should we ask about Prince Charles and Camilla Parker?:rolleyes:
"Awas,Hati - Hati ", to both parties. Don't go there unless u know and he has, severed the emotional relationship with the wife, in a committment to go forward with u.
Hi gilrs..
pls share with me ..if u ever meet or falling in love with married man before? how is going on ? its cool blink2 or what...???
not cool.,
ever.
if he cheats on her with you, do you really think he wont cheat on you?
Rushing Doll
11-07-09, 12:55
1. You are right about cheating.
2. Will you change that avatar its making me sick
1. cheers.
2, eventually.
You mean a young woman wanted to get ahead (a head, haha, get it) professionally so she got involved with Slick Willy.
Hmmm ..the man inability to keep his pants zipped, because of Bill there was an explosion in Oral Sex:p
Clinton did wander into Indonesia. He was looking for a little something to keep his bit on the side happy.
http://i41.photobucket.com/albums/e294/realindonesia/viagra-1.jpg
I've really lost faith in all politicians. They just don't learn from the mistakes of others.
http://i41.photobucket.com/albums/e294/realindonesia/Monica.gif
Rushing Doll
11-07-09, 13:15
look forward to it.
Just to put the boot on the other paw, how would other married fellas here deal with a young nubile woman falling for them? Maybe we should start a pole? (Pun INtended).
hi java girl72
i did. wanna know further?
cheers...:rapture:
drahman2in1
27-09-09, 13:51
sure ,,but in real is the grass next door more beautifull right?? i know my friend cheating with someone outside ,,but how to telling her about that.,just know each other..friend secret?? upssssss
Rule number 1 in looking for partner in life: Never fall in love with somebody else's husband...if you want to have good future and live your life to the fullest, dont hurt other woman...
http://www.livinginindonesiaforum.org/images/icons/icon7.gif
waarmstrong
27-09-09, 14:11
i did. wanna know further?
No, not really. But then again, it might be interesting to see what a full paragraph or two composed by Awsome might look like.
Anna Yulinda
28-09-09, 00:08
1 of my best friends,he's married man...but we could keep our relation till now coz there's commitment....just a best friend.
Married man knows how to understand and how to treat girl well more............( sound nice?? )
You'll just be headed for disaster. It's not worth the risk+heartbreak.
Anna Yulinda
13-10-09, 16:28
I think as long as we have commitment" just a friend"...there's no big matter cos I already have boy friend. Our relationship is long distance.He is in Japan now....oooh it's not easy sometimes i missed him so much!!!!
Ehmmmm need new boy friend now :frown2:
lookingforlife
04-06-10, 08:17
i am married and many girls like me.
I say no because I really love her.
If they want other playthings, they do not love her.
Girls who want to be playthings are stupid and will eventually be thrown away like garbage by the heartless man.
silly rabbits...
Holy thread necromancy, Batman!
I once asked a priest if it was Ok to sleep with another mans wife, the reply
"YES" gobsmacked it was followed with "as long as that is all you do"
I said no! All you get is heartache! Dont even think that a married man will replace his wife for you... If he is having an affair it is because he just want some variety and some past time and that is you!
Why would you settle for such a headache? There is so many single guys around. And besides, if I am the wife, I'll make sure that I will humiliate you if I found out.
Cleer up your mind. If he wants to choose you then, he should had left his wife already. Other than that, it is just a game and you are the toy.
1 of my best friends,he's married man...but we could keep our relation till now coz there's commitment....just a best friend.
Married man knows how to understand and how to treat girl well more............( sound nice?? )
I just want to clarify, one of my bestfriend is also a guy. he is my bestfriend as in we are not intimate. We hang out together with my family and his gf too. I dont understand what you mean by bestfriend here? Is sleeping with him included? If yes, then dont label it as friendship coz real friendship is different from teman tidur.
if I am the wife, I'll make sure that I will humiliate you if I found out.
If my husband or boyfriend cheats on me, I would just let him go without any fuss. Obviously he's not worth wasting my time for.
Ah, the eternal question, can a boy and a girl be really close friends without ultimately turning romantic?
If my husband or boyfriend cheats on me, I would just let him go without any fuss. Obviously he's not worth wasting my time for.
When your partner cheats on you, it implies that the other man/woman is better than you. Many people can handle losing a partner yet can't get over the implied idea that they are inadequate.
A person with a healthy self esteem would just be heartbroken because she/he doesn't believe the affair proves her/him substandard, but a person with low self esteem will be heartbroken AND deeply insulted.
I think as long as we have commitment" just a friend"...there's no big matter cos I already have boy friend. Our relationship is long distance.He is in Japan now....oooh it's not easy sometimes i missed him so much!!!!
Ehmmmm need new boy friend now :frown2:
So you have a boyfriend in Japan, and also a "just a friend" . What will your boyfriend feel ?
Ah, the eternal question, can a boy and a girl be really close friends without ultimately turning romantic?
Of course yes, my best is a dutch. He is like my brother. Even now that I am married and he is far, I always ask help from him and advices. He is also engage. And I swear to God when we are together in one workplace and hangs out almost everyday, it never happens that we become romantic to each other. He is good looking and most of the times girls envy me, thought I am the gf. We just laugh when people asked why dont you two just be together?" We usually answered jokingly, " We are too hot for each other"... We both value the friendship so much and we respect each other so much too even if I havent seen him for almost 7 years now.
If my husband or boyfriend cheats on me, I would just let him go without any fuss. Obviously he's not worth wasting my time for.
Yes but what if you found out that there's a woman teasing your husband all the time? Are you not gonna get mad of that woman, knowing that this man have a wife and a family but she is still doing it?
Is it always the man's fault if they cheat? Is it not also the fault of these women who love to tease them and offering themselves to them? yes of course, its a man's fault because he cannot control himself. But can a man handle a woman getting naked on his front and bending over everytime she sees him? Licking her fingers and showing her breast?
The OP said she is the one falling in love with the married man, and hell yes she will do something to get him... No its not cool and no I dont find it nice reading this. Having a family of my own. Imagine the family that this girl gonna ruin? The kids? The wife? The trauma?....Because of your little game of falling in love with a married man and not thinking about the damages that your game will cause.
Perhaps I should share my experience with women like this. Me and my husband often exchange handphone and one day, he left his handphone with me when he is off to work and suddenly I receive sms from his colleague saying " Hey mister you look so hot and sexy today", you are very sexy, maybe you want to invite me out sometime"... Next thing she knew I went to the school and reported her sms to the principal and she was reprimanded for misbehaving!
No its not always your husband's fault....
Yes but what if you found out that there's a woman teasing your husband all the time? Are you not gonna get mad of that woman, knowing that this man have a wife and a family but she is still doing it?
Is it always the man's fault if they cheat? Is it not also the fault of these women who love to tease them and offering themselves to them? yes of course, its a man's fault because he cannot control himself. But can a man handle a woman getting naked on his front and bending over everytime she sees him? Licking her fingers and showing her breast?
The OP said she is the one falling in love with the married man, and hell yes she will do something to get him... No its not cool and no I dont find it nice reading this. Having a family of my own. Imagine the family that this girl gonna ruin? The kids? The wife? The trauma?....Because of your little game of falling in love with a married man and not thinking about the damages that your game will cause.
Perhaps I should share my experience with women like this. Me and my husband often exchange handphone and one day, he left his handphone with me when he is off to work and suddenly I receive sms from his colleague saying " Hey mister you look so hot and sexy today", you are very sexy, maybe you want to invite me out sometime"... Next thing she knew I went to the school and reported her sms to the principal and she was reprimanded for misbehaving!
No its not always your husband's fault....
Hmmm. The same answer from me Kverz. I would just let him (and her) go without any fuss, wish them a happy life. Life is too short.
(But remember, it always takes two to tango)
If a man cheats, it's his fault. Maybe the girl is wrong for luring him into the situation but the determinining factor is whether or not he chooses to do anything about it. If he acts upon it, he is in the wrong surely. It absolutely does take two to tango but just because the woman came on to the man and 'teased' him etc doesn't make it all the girls fault...
If a man cheats, it's his fault. Maybe the girl is wrong for luring him into the situation but the determinining factor is whether or not he chooses to do anything about it. If he acts upon it, he is in the wrong surely. It absolutely does take two to tango but just because the woman came on to the man and 'teased' him etc doesn't make it all the girls fault...
Agree! And its not only the man's fault as well... History has it... Eve teased Adam to eat the fruit, Samson fooled Delilah...and so on and so forth...
And as a woman, one should have decency of keeping away from married man for dignity and compassion for the other. Ladies, do not lower yourself to be labeled as husband-grabbing lunatic...There are many men around...Choose and be wise!
Perhaps this is another cultural thing. It is widely believed in Indonesia that men tend to be weak when it comes to women. A woman teasing a married man is often viewed as an abuser of that "power". Colloquially this is also acknowledged in the West with sayings like "God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time".
Perhaps this is another cultural thing. It is widely believed in Indonesia that men tend to be weak when it comes to women. A woman teasing a married man is often viewed as an abuser of that "power". Colloquially this is also acknowledged in the West with sayings like "God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time".
Ya this is the typical bullshit cast on women so they will believe it, like Kverz has. The more this is believed the more the sympathy men get for sticking there dicks into pussy they dont have a comittment too. Utter crap. If a guy goes with another woman regardless of whether she knows he is married or not it is all his doing and the marriage has problems probably unresolvable but not always in rare cases. He is looking for much2 more than sex. He is looking for much more than his wife seemingly from his point of view is giving. Love, reasurance, support, encouragement in many facits of life, letting him be who he is instead of trying to mold him into the man she idealy wants. To think it is all sexual is naive. Married women either give what is needed and desired or they don't. If you don't move on and find another man cuz yours left long ago, with or without another woman. To blame the woman wiggling her ass is like blaming the symptoms for the disease. If a woman wants to revenge over this she has already missed the boat.
Ya this is the typical bullshit cast on women so they will believe it, like Kverz has. The more this is believed the more the sympathy men get for sticking there dicks into pussy they dont have a comittment too. Utter crap. If a guy goes with another woman regardless of whether she knows he is married or not it is all his doing and the marriage has problems probably unresolvable but not always in rare cases. He is looking for much2 more than sex. He is looking for much more than his wife seemingly from his point of view is giving. Love, reasurance, support, encouragement in many facits of life, letting him be who he is instead of trying to mold him into the man she idealy wants. To think it is all sexual is naive. Married women either give what is needed and desired or they don't. If you don't move on and find another man cuz yours left long ago, with or without another woman. To blame the woman wiggling her ass is like blaming the symptoms for the disease. If a woman wants to revenge over this she has already missed the boat.
Very well said!
Ya this is the typical bullshit cast on women so they will believe it, like Kverz has. The more this is believed the more the sympathy men get for sticking there dicks into pussy they dont have a comittment too. Utter crap. If a guy goes with another woman regardless of whether she knows he is married or not it is all his doing and the marriage has problems probably unresolvable but not always in rare cases. He is looking for much2 more than sex. He is looking for much more than his wife seemingly from his point of view is giving. Love, reasurance, support, encouragement in many facits of life, letting him be who he is instead of trying to mold him into the man she idealy wants. To think it is all sexual is naive. Married women either give what is needed and desired or they don't. If you don't move on and find another man cuz yours left long ago, with or without another woman. To blame the woman wiggling her ass is like blaming the symptoms for the disease. If a woman wants to revenge over this she has already missed the boat.
Of course the guy is responsible for his part of the action, but unless the gal doesn't know he's married, she is not innocent. I do not go for other people's partner (despite a couple of clear invitations), because I think it's unethical and I respect myself more than that. Therefore, I have no sympathy for women who do.
for OP:
The term is not 'falling in love", it is "Falling in LUST"....
trust me, better say your price, coz the relationship is either going nowhere, or ruins everything.....
Carrot Cake
06-06-10, 11:05
It's all about choices and consequences. For both sides.
Marriage is not an absolute ending. It's not even an ending. How many of you feel that you're 'stuck' with the wrong person? Bet more than two raised hands.
So, in my humble opinion, nothing is wrong with falling in love (or lust.. whatever) with married men, as long as you are prepared for the consequences. Someone might get hurt (it could be you)... or get rich (from alimony).
Look around! How many of those who has chosen the same option end up happy? And how much is your chance to end up happy? Statistics rarely make mistake. Use is wisely.
P.S. I am married (at least for now)
There's happiness, and then there are principles. The institution called marriage still means something to me. If I have a problem with my partner, I will go through a divorce before I go out and get another one. If I'm single and I'm attracted to a woman whose marriage is in trouble, I will make it plain and clear that I will not have a romantic relationship until her divorce is finalized. It's old school, but that's me. If she can't handle it, then she's not compatible with my values.
Carrot Cake
06-06-10, 12:55
There's happiness, and then there are principles. The institution called marriage still means something to me. If I have a problem with my partner, I will go through a divorce before I go out and get another one. If I'm single and I'm attracted to a woman whose marriage is in trouble, I will make it plain and clear that I will not have a romantic relationship until her divorce is finalized. It's old school, but that's me. If she can't handle it, then she's not compatible with my values.
I understand your point, Injun, but you must admit that sometimes things don't happen the way it should. We defo talk about two different things here. Sacred union and legal contract. You may be lucky to have a sacred union. But some others are stuck with legal contract. My reply tried to look on the case from OP's corner. I assume she is still single, so sacred union things might be beyond her comprehension.
The feeling itself is natural. Feeling in love with more than one person is natural since human basically not a monogamous species. What really matters is how we reflect the feeling to our overt behavior. Happiness and sadness, both are temporary feelings. Burst of excitement (positive or negative) based on certain events (spiced up with certain hormones). They are very unstable, subjective and unreliable. That's why i stick with statistics who have smaller chance of errors, but still alert of exceptions.
Of course the guy is responsible for his part of the action, but unless the gal doesn't know he's married, she is not innocent. I do not go for other people's partner (despite a couple of clear invitations), because I think it's unethical and I respect myself more than that. Therefore, I have no sympathy for women who do.
Im talking about within the confines of marriage. The guy and his wife are the ones who are married not the woman wiggling the carrott in his face. Yes many would say her actions are objectionable but she had nothing to do with the deteriation of the marriage. For he to step out on his wife and comittment to her it was over before he played with the other.
gottalovepuppies
06-06-10, 17:59
Perhaps this is another cultural thing. It is widely believed in Indonesia that men tend to be weak when it comes to women. A woman teasing a married man is often viewed as an abuser of that "power". Colloquially this is also acknowledged in the West with sayings like "God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time".
I enjoy your posts most of the time, but I must disagree with this point. It is not women's fault that 'men tend to be weak when it comes to women'. No one's twisting the man's arm to cheat, however seductive the other woman might be. Like you, they have the option to say no but chose not to. This is not a weakness but a decision made.
I enjoy your posts most of the time, but I must disagree with this point. It is not women's fault that 'men tend to be weak when it comes to women'. No one's twisting the man's arm to cheat, however seductive the other woman might be. Like you, they have the option to say no but chose not to. This is not a weakness but a decision made.
I'm saying that "it's widely believed in Indonesia", not "I believe".:)
Im talking about within the confines of marriage. The guy and his wife are the ones who are married not the woman wiggling the carrott in his face. Yes many would say her actions are objectionable but she had nothing to do with the deteriation of the marriage. For he to step out on his wife and comittment to her it was over before he played with the other.
You're right, the marriage must be in trouble to begin with. Still I don't sympathize with the other woman who chooses to be the nail in the coffin.
waarmstrong
06-06-10, 22:14
I'm saying that "it's widely believed in Indonesia", not "I believe".:)
I think he meant to say, "My countrymen are sexist dolts for the most part, but not me."
You're right, the marriage must be in trouble to begin with. Still I don't sympathize with the other woman who chooses to be the nail in the coffin.
The nail was already driven. Whats to sympathize. I just don't blame her for his failed marriage like a few posters were doing. That was the point.
Sidebar, how could these two, cheating man and woman knowingly dating a married man go from that to trusting each other in their new relatiionship together? I wonder what the success rate of relationships starting out that way is.
I understand your point, Injun, but you must admit that sometimes things don't happen the way it should. We defo talk about two different things here. Sacred union and legal contract. You may be lucky to have a sacred union. But some others are stuck with legal contract. My reply tried to look on the case from OP's corner. I assume she is still single, so sacred union things might be beyond her comprehension.
The feeling itself is natural. Feeling in love with more than one person is natural since human basically not a monogamous species. What really matters is how we reflect the feeling to our overt behavior. Happiness and sadness, both are temporary feelings. Burst of excitement (positive or negative) based on certain events (spiced up with certain hormones). They are very unstable, subjective and unreliable. That's why i stick with statistics who have smaller chance of errors, but still alert of exceptions.
There are many people who stay married despite absence of love out of convenience. As long as both parties understand they are free to go out with other people (the so called Open Marriage), it's tolerable. When one party raises a stink over the other's infidelity, obviously there is no such deal.
Falling in love is natural indeed, but when a woman actively engages a married man she's no longer just feeling it, she is taking an action. You can't be held responsible for your feelings, but you can (and will) be held responsible for your actions.
Just a little story:
She was daughter of my mom's friend. We were invited to their place in Sukabumi for a picnic. We hit it off right away. We never sat without other people present, and her boy friend was even there (although my GF wasn't), but it didn't matter. We talked about mundane things like weather, the house, university, and even each other's steady dates, but the words seemed to carry different meanings understood only by the two of us.
I said: "Taking 21 credits a semester is a pain, but I want to finish early" (I adore you)
She said: "For sure, that's why I only take 17" (and I you)
Months later I drove my parents to their place in Jakarta because they agreed to help with her wedding. She wasn't there. Later I learned that she went upstairs when she saw us, which is rather odd and a bit discorteous. Her parents and mine were puzzled, I wasn't.
I honored my commitment and she honored hers, and that was that.
I'm a little bit confused what the issue actually is to be honest. I understand about differing cultural views etc but at the end of the day, yes, the woman is very much in the wrong but at the end of the day. The man is the one who has already made themarriage commitment (or the woman if the situation is flipped). Just because some girl is offering herself, doesn't mean the guy has to go for it. A mate of mine once gave the scenario that if someone punches you in the face, they can't give their excuse as "oh, you're face was there". It's a little bit of an odd analagy but it kinda makes sense. You can't blame someone else for your own actions. If you are old enough to get into a (legal) marriage commitment, you are old enough to know right from wrong...
Soap box episode over!
Carrot Cake
07-06-10, 08:38
There are many people who stay married despite absence of love out of convenience. As long as both parties understand they are free to go out with other people (the so called Open Marriage), it's tolerable. When one party raises a stink over the other's infidelity, obviously there is no such deal.
Falling in love is natural indeed, but when a woman actively engages a married man she's no longer just feeling it, she is taking an action. You can't be held responsible for your feelings, but you can (and will) be held responsible for your actions.
I completely agree with your second pharagraph. We are what we do, not what we think or say. I value marriage more than a piece of paper and a blessed sacrament. But I have witnessed the worst of the worst form of marriage as a result of marrying the wrong person that provided me some kind of understanding (not acceptance) for infidelity conducts. There is no such things as open marriage in my vocabulary. It against every aspect of marriage. Honest to your partner by betraying your own marriage? I can't see which part of it that is better than infidelity conducts. Sounds fun but downgrades my conscience at the same time.
I believe things happen for reasons. If something's broken, it's either they deserve it or better plan awaiting. I don't judge.. well, I try not to. Everything is case specific. People choose their paths and they will carry all consequences that come along the way, whether they like it or not. Good or bad could only be seen by the eyes of time.
Just a little story:
She was daughter of my mom's friend. We were invited to their place in Sukabumi for a picnic. We hit it off right away. We never sat without other people present, and her boy friend was even there (although my GF wasn't), but it didn't matter. We talked about mundane things like weather, the house, university, and even each other's steady dates, but the words seemed to carry different meanings understood only by the two of us.
I said: "Taking 21 credits a semester is a pain, but I want to finish early" (I adore you)
She said: "For sure, that's why I only take 17" (and I you)
Months later I drove my parents to their place in Jakarta because they agreed to help with her wedding. She wasn't there. Later I learned that she went upstairs when she saw us, which is rather odd and a bit discorteous. Her parents and mine were puzzled, I wasn't.
I honored my commitment and she honored hers, and that was that.
good storythere mate...
We need to , also, understand here, marriage is "JUST" a cultural process . Its like you go to school, then university then get the work, marriage etc. I would call that part of sequential cultural process because, in many occassions, marriage is just another name for legalize sex . Political bond rather than spiritual maturity process, thats why you often see here, marriage processes involves tonnes of people, huge celebrations and great amount of money. Whether the couple are actualy spiritually bond by Love or lust, or in pure conscience to decide this kinda thing , no one care. Mommy happy, daddy happy, family happy, neighbors happy, free food, and most importantly, God bless y'alll for legal humpin.....
Thats why I'm not surprise to see these kind of cases....
coz whether the couple themselves love each other or not, they'll know after years of marriage. by the time they realize that, THE Culture 'jailed' them and scare them with lots of social pressur and punishment.....
Back to the topic,
I do strongly believe, this relationship will go nowhere (Unless these 'lovers' finally decided to break all social pressure which is a very rare case here). Or the guy force his wife to allow polygamy process ( quite often here). Otherwise, for them, just grab the condom = or tampon or whatever = and start find some hotels or apartment for rent, together. Never record the private 'process' on the Handphone, coz you might ended up makin scandal in national television.
waarmstrong
07-06-10, 10:57
I completely agree ... People choose their paths and they will carry all consequences that come along the way, whether they like it or not. Good or bad could only be seen by the eyes of time.
I agree but had a hard time concentrating on you thoughts; kept glancing at you new avatar. Distracting. Maybe a little more sugar in your lemon juice would help.
Carrot Cake
07-06-10, 13:40
... new avatar. Distracting.
I'll take it as a compliment. Thanks.. :becky:
Carrot Cake
07-06-10, 15:14
Don't!
But this one is airbrush free, Grat. I thought you Guys like the original? :whistle:
gottalovepuppies
07-06-10, 15:38
I'm saying that "it's widely believed in Indonesia", not "I believe".:)
Point taken- I disagreed with your post, not your own belief. :D
But this one is airbrush free, Grat. I thought you Guys like the original? :whistle:
Thinking: <I was going to airbrush orf the black negligee and then let my imagination run wild on your last photo.>
I can't even airbrush a smile on your latest pic.
Ya this is the typical bullshit cast on women so they will believe it, like Kverz has. The more this is believed the more the sympathy men get for sticking there dicks into pussy they dont have
Correction Pimpin, I dont sympathize with the men sticking their penis to pussy they dont have and so thus to women seducing married men! They are all the same, hence my reply is to the OP because she is a woman and she should be aware with her situation...
The point is that, why would a woman like you degrade yourself for going with a married man ,take all the bullshits that goes with that relationship and ruin a family if you have much better choices? Are you that desperate? I have a friend who have the same thing and what does she got? Promises that he will leave his family but never happened. She will call me in the middle of the night crying coz she envy the wife and the kids. And what is left with her? HEARTACHES and SEX! And poor her until now she still believe that good thing will come up with it-its been 4 years! She wasted her life... If the man wants to leave his family and wife, he already did it long time ago...
I thought we're talkin bout airbrush now ???
Cryptkeeper
07-06-10, 22:31
History tends to repeat it self..
I'm new here, but this subject hit too close to home. I'm Indonesian, was living in the US...married to whom I thought my soul mate...an American man (he doesn't even deserve to be called a man). We were together for 8 yrs, married for 4. Found out he's been cheating with his co-worker for the past 2-yrs. Now, I know our marriage hasn't been great ever since I battled my depression, and I didn't do good enough as a wife. Wait! I'm saying I played my part that our marriage unraveled; however, I got nothing to do with his decision to cheat. This other woman, she was married too...she got a divorce before I found this out. Then once I confronted my (ex) husband, he too demanded a divorce. Yes, I said demanded. I wanted to reconcile. I truly believe if we could work this out, on top of my depression....? it's worth the tears. It didn't take much for me to realize he showed no remorse. I did contact the other women, in very adult professional way. I simply told her that I knew about the affair, and asked her to step aside while he and I worked our issues. To stop the affair and at least wait until he's no longer married. She apologized...in front of me.....but I found out they never really cut it off. That was it.. so I flew home, after 20-yrs being away.
Sorry...back to being the other woman....well, honey, you will always be that....the 'other' woman. Even if you end up with him, you know it in your heart...and he knows it. Be ready to sleep with one opened eye...i'm just sayin....
Sorry...back to being the other woman....well, honey, you will always be that....the 'other' woman. Even if you end up with him, you know it in your heart...and he knows it. Be ready to sleep with one opened eye...i'm just sayin....
Sorry to hear your story but be thankful that you are out from that situation.. Yes back to the Op I agree, since he did it to his wife, there's 99.9 percent that he will do it to you too even if you end up with him... He cheated with his wife, and you are not an exemption...
I'm new here, but this subject hit too close to home. I'm Indonesian, was living in the US...married to whom I thought my soul mate...an American man (he doesn't even deserve to be called a man). We were together for 8 yrs, married for 4. Found out he's been cheating with his co-worker for the past 2-yrs. Now, I know our marriage hasn't been great ever since I battled my depression, and I didn't do good enough as a wife. Wait! I'm saying I played my part that our marriage unraveled; however, I got nothing to do with his decision to cheat. This other woman, she was married too...she got a divorce before I found this out. Then once I confronted my (ex) husband, he too demanded a divorce. Yes, I said demanded. I wanted to reconcile. I truly believe if we could work this out, on top of my depression....? it's worth the tears. It didn't take much for me to realize he showed no remorse. I did contact the other women, in very adult professional way. I simply told her that I knew about the affair, and asked her to step aside while he and I worked our issues. To stop the affair and at least wait until he's no longer married. She apologized...in front of me.....but I found out they never really cut it off. That was it.. so I flew home, after 20-yrs being away.
Sorry...back to being the other woman....well, honey, you will always be that....the 'other' woman. Even if you end up with him, you know it in your heart...and he knows it. Be ready to sleep with one opened eye...i'm just sayin....
thank you for sharing and sorry to hear that... you're right though, he does not deserve to be called a man...I mean Man fool around thats true - no matter what status he's in-, but when he decided to be in a serious commitment, the commitment itself should be his responsibility, thats what makes a man, real man......
gottalovepuppies
08-06-10, 16:20
I'm new here, but this subject hit too close to home. I'm Indonesian, was living in the US...married to whom I thought my soul mate...an American man (he doesn't even deserve to be called a man). We were together for 8 yrs, married for 4. Found out he's been cheating with his co-worker for the past 2-yrs. Now, I know our marriage hasn't been great ever since I battled my depression, and I didn't do good enough as a wife. Wait! I'm saying I played my part that our marriage unraveled; however, I got nothing to do with his decision to cheat. This other woman, she was married too...she got a divorce before I found this out. Then once I confronted my (ex) husband, he too demanded a divorce. Yes, I said demanded. I wanted to reconcile. I truly believe if we could work this out, on top of my depression....? it's worth the tears. It didn't take much for me to realize he showed no remorse. I did contact the other women, in very adult professional way. I simply told her that I knew about the affair, and asked her to step aside while he and I worked our issues. To stop the affair and at least wait until he's no longer married. She apologized...in front of me.....but I found out they never really cut it off. That was it.. so I flew home, after 20-yrs being away.
Sorry...back to being the other woman....well, honey, you will always be that....the 'other' woman. Even if you end up with him, you know it in your heart...and he knows it. Be ready to sleep with one opened eye...i'm just sayin....
Dear oinkoink, I'm sorry this happened to you. Hope you're succeeding in battling your depression. You didn't find your soulmate in him, but I'm sure you will in time.
All the best to you.
I'm new here, but this subject hit too close to home. I'm Indonesian, was living in the US...married to whom I thought my soul mate...an American man (he doesn't even deserve to be called a man). We were together for 8 yrs, married for 4. Found out he's been cheating with his co-worker for the past 2-yrs. Now, I know our marriage hasn't been great ever since I battled my depression, and I didn't do good enough as a wife. Wait! I'm saying I played my part that our marriage unraveled; however, I got nothing to do with his decision to cheat. This other woman, she was married too...she got a divorce before I found this out. Then once I confronted my (ex) husband, he too demanded a divorce. Yes, I said demanded. I wanted to reconcile. I truly believe if we could work this out, on top of my depression....? it's worth the tears. It didn't take much for me to realize he showed no remorse. I did contact the other women, in very adult professional way. I simply told her that I knew about the affair, and asked her to step aside while he and I worked our issues. To stop the affair and at least wait until he's no longer married. She apologized...in front of me.....but I found out they never really cut it off. That was it.. so I flew home, after 20-yrs being away.
Sorry...back to being the other woman....well, honey, you will always be that....the 'other' woman. Even if you end up with him, you know it in your heart...and he knows it. Be ready to sleep with one opened eye...i'm just sayin....
I'm sorry for your predicament. He has decided that his happiness must come first above all else, so in this case so should you. Just close that chapter and move on.
Thank you for the encouragements. This whole ordeal made me realize I am stronger than I thought and a better person than I gave myself credit for. This might be the big change that I need :)
http://glo.msn.com/relationships/beware-the-husband-hunter-1533311.story?ocid=xnetr1-1
JWilliamson
14-06-10, 15:06
Marriage is a beautiful thing but not all partners grow together. some grow faster and others dont want to grow. if someone falls in love with a married person they shouldnt expect nor demand them to get a divorve especially if they knew they were married. if their goal was friendship with or without sex well they got it but if they went in wanting to have it all well they will be disapointed. a marriage requires a lot of courage to see our faults. a marriage will become a mirror and we will see the lies and the faults each one has been hiding.
JWilliamson
14-06-10, 15:11
why would she have envy for the wife? her husband is cheating on her and probablly not spending enough time with the kids. If your friend wants sex and some talk then she will not be upset but if she wants a husband then she would do better looking for a single man.
JWilliamson
14-06-10, 15:38
You say this as if you have no emotional attachments. You just let him go as if he is a object that you have no further use for. JW
JWilliamson
14-06-10, 15:39
If my husband or boyfriend cheats on me, I would just let him go without any fuss. Obviously he's not worth wasting my time for.
You say this as if you have no emotional attachments. You just let him go as if he is a object that you have no further use for. JW
JWilliamson
14-06-10, 15:41
Ah, the eternal question, can a boy and a girl be really close friends without ultimately turning romantic? yes if he lets her put him in her "just friend list" or hes gay or hes butt ugly or the other way around.
JWilliamson
14-06-10, 16:25
Yes but what if you found out that there's a woman teasing your husband all the time? Are you not gonna get mad of that woman, knowing that this man have a wife and a family but she is still doing it?
Is it always the man's fault if they cheat? Is it not also the fault of these women who love to tease them and offering themselves to them? yes of course, its a man's fault because he cannot control himself. But can a man handle a woman getting naked on his front and bending over everytime she sees him? Licking her fingers and showing her breast?
The OP said she is the one falling in love with the married man, and hell yes she will do something to get him... No its not cool and no I dont find it nice reading this. Having a family of my own. Imagine the family that this girl gonna ruin? The kids? The wife? The trauma?....Because of your little game of falling in love with a married man and not thinking about the damages that your game will cause.
Perhaps I should share my experience with women like this. Me and my husband often exchange handphone and one day, he left his handphone with me when he is off to work and suddenly I receive sms from his colleague saying " Hey mister you look so hot and sexy today", you are very sexy, maybe you want to invite me out sometime"... Next thing she knew I went to the school and reported her sms to the principal and she was reprimanded for misbehaving!
No its not always your husband's fault....
What if a man acts on his natural instincts does that ruined all the relationship? is sex with another person as bad as sex with someone they love? many men do cheat but they cheat usually with no emotional attachment while women who cheat as much or c lose to as much as the men do usually cheat for emotions and not for only the physical aspects of the sex.
What if a man acts on his natural instincts does that ruined all the relationship? is sex with another person as bad as sex with someone they love? many men do cheat but they cheat usually with no emotional attachment while women who cheat as much or c lose to as much as the men do usually cheat for emotions and not for only the physical aspects of the sex.
Whatever the reason is, it is still cheating. Cheating your wife or your husband or seducing someone else husband or wife is just equally the same.
JWilliamson
15-06-10, 09:32
There's happiness, and then there are principles. The institution called marriage still means something to me. If I have a problem with my partner, I will go through a divorce before I go out and get another one. If I'm single and I'm attracted to a woman whose marriage is in trouble, I will make it plain and clear that I will not have a romantic relationship until her divorce is finalized. It's old school, but that's me. If she can't handle it, then she's not compatible with my values.
An ideal way to think.
JWilliamson
15-06-10, 09:33
Whatever the reason is, it is still cheating. Cheating your wife or your husband or seducing someone else husband or wife is just equally the same. Partners can cheat in many ways and it doesnt start with the body but the mind.
Cryptkeeper
15-06-10, 20:44
lol..
If you're married, play the game once in a while, I guess it should be okay,given the permission from the opposite partners, of course....
Partners can cheat in many ways and it doesnt start with the body but the mind.
Yes exactly, and affairs are categorized in many ways too and one of it is called emotional affair-It is when you rely on someone for emotional comfort other than your better half.
what you get from having an affair with a married man?
- heartache, mentioned by kverz ya if i am not mistaken,
- humiliation. how would you feel if the official partner finds out about the affair and confront it with you? at home or at work? what would your parents/big family or even the society think of you now?
- guilty feeling for the rest of your life for ruining someone's marriage. not to mention if your affair has children.
it is very rarely that the man will end up marrying the affair..
just don't let yourself to be carried away with all his sweet talks and affectionate actions toward you. don't get big-headed thinking that he will always think of you when he is with his family..
well, in short, just stop this stupid act of yours immediately..
All right people this thread is closed. Nothing more to say, nothing more to see. Watch to your left theres an unguarded stairwell as you get on your way back home.
All right people this thread is closed. Nothing more to say, nothing more to see. Watch to your left theres an unguarded stairwell as you get on your way back home.
Thanks Kratos, do you have a satpam whistle and uniform to go with that misplaced arrogance ?
Don't need a whistle when you naturally command the attention and movements of people as I am. Certainly nothing you would understand. You're probably married aren't you.
Don't need a whistle when you naturally command the attention and movements of people as I am. Certainly nothing you would understand. You're probably married aren't you.
Is this you ?
http://polrestemanggung.net/v2/foto/parkir.jpg
Lots of indo girls do ths, to get rich n get out of the poverty n disaster stricken couNtry. They dun bother abt vAlues, or hUrting others. Finding maRried men is their national hobby,it seems. Another good gal friend suffered the same fate of having husband fall prey to such women. There is one gal erliana who continUes contacting expat who left her,hoping he back fetch her to his country. Pm me if u wana get her.. And off our backs.
Lots of indo girls do ths, to get rich n get out of the poverty n disaster stricken couNtry. They dun bother abt vAlues, or hUrting others. Finding maRried men is their national hobby,it seems. Another good gal friend suffered the same fate of having husband fall prey to such women. There is one gal erliana who continUes contacting expat who left her,hoping he back fetch her to his country. Pm me if u wana get her.. And off our backs.
Oh you poor dear, the boyfriend prefers his x to you does he ?
I wonder why...
Pictures and specs please.....and special ability or movement or licenses if there's one....
Lots of indo girls do ths, to get rich n get out of the poverty n disaster stricken couNtry. They dun bother abt vAlues, or hUrting others. Finding maRried men is their national hobby,it seems. Another good gal friend suffered the same fate of having husband fall prey to such women. There is one gal erliana who continUes contacting expat who left her,hoping he back fetch her to his country. Pm me if u wana get her.. And off our backs.
Great first post too, BTW.
A member here for 2 years, and finally you decide to post about an ex that your boyfriend/husband keeps on secretly meeting.
Never mind your carte blanche sweeping generalizations about an entire nation of girls.
Honestly, if you dont like it here, go home.
Lots of indo girls do ths, to get rich n get out of the poverty n disaster stricken couNtry. They dun bother abt vAlues, or hUrting others. Finding maRried men is their national hobby,it seems. Another good gal friend suffered the same fate of having husband fall prey to such women. There is one gal erliana who continUes contacting expat who left her,hoping he back fetch her to his country.Pm me if u wana get her.. And off our backs.
So is it your friend ? or your problem ?
:lol:
Great first post too, BTW.
A member here for 2 years, and finally you decide to post about an ex that your boyfriend/husband keeps on secretly meeting.
Never mind your carte blanche sweeping generalizations about an entire nation of girls.
Honestly, if you dont like it here, go home.
After...
Pictures and specs please.....and special ability or movement or licenses if there's one....
and prices too please...
stt_cibubur
17-11-10, 11:45
Sound like a story from a movie...wonder what it is..
Sound like a story from a movie...wonder what it is..
Movie?? It is a reality show that happens on a daily basis...
mayasaputri
17-11-10, 22:50
My goodness, Java Girl, is 72 your IQ? What idiot is going to share their tryst just for your titillation?
i have to be agree with you in this case
Hi gilrs..
pls share with me ..if u ever meet or falling in love with married man before? how is going on ? its cool blink2 or what...???
never, and i hope i won't falling in love with a married man in the future.. i know how it's hurt (not only for his wife, but also for his children)
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