View Full Version : How to impress a lady who I just met ?
OK so I just met this lady from a gathering event last night. She seems to be the one for me. I have her number, but I am not sure if I call her right away. I want to impress her with something, but not sure. I need some advise in this forum what to do :-P
Pak Gondrong
24-08-11, 09:13
In China they say; nan ren bu huai, nu ren bu ai
OK so I just met this lady from a gathering event last night. She seems to be the one for me. I have her number, but I am not sure if I call her right away. I want to impress her with something, but not sure. I need some advise in this forum what to do :-PA friend of mine would tell you not to take her for a ride in your car. Dangerous. You could be at least taken to custody to a police station which would not impress her.* :smile2:
* My friend's crap advise is not to be taken seriously.
Hi sayap
Atlantis just get an électrochoc from an other tread on this forum... He is now releasing the over pressure ;)
From my point of view, if you think you need to impress her for she get interested to you... it's because you don't have chance, or after she realize that all what you show her since the beginning was fake for impress her, she will drop you...
How to impress her... hmmm Try to have a normal conversation with her without fixing her b**b's
That must impress her!!!
But... I myself stay single for a long long time, so... don't listen to my advise!!!
Multiple ATMs, and a fat wallet?
Mercedes?
A big bunch of flowers?
Just give her a call, ask her out for a coffee or a meal where she will be comfortable, and be yourself, then see how it goes
coucou.cherie
24-08-11, 10:17
just be creative and unpredictable...
also, do not straight show her that you are hittin on her. maintain the space
that kinda guy would impress me very much.
Money would comes far later.
ScooterIndo
24-08-11, 10:31
How do you know she is the one for you ??? silly statement till you know her better.
Stop being a wuss - women hate that !!! grow a pair and phone her!!! .
What you think she gave you her number for ???
She wants to be called -coffee and lunch are for associates and friends, dinner is always much more intimate, take her to a nice restaurant. Make sure you pick her up and make sure you drop her of at the end of the night - dont just chuck her in a cab. If the dinner goes well suggest moving on for a couple of drinks but dont get drunk and dont let her get drunk you will both regret it - expect a small kiss or exchange of affection like a hug or holding hands - dont try to bang her on the first date.
A friend of mine would tell you not to take her for a ride in your car. Dangerous. You could be at least taken to custody to a police station which would not impress her.* :smile2:
* My friend's crap advise is not to be taken seriously.
Atlantis, I would rather to be taken to custody but as long as she visits me regularly. :becky:
just be creative and unpredictable...
also, do not straight show her that you are hittin on her. maintain the space
that kinda guy would impress me very much.
Money would comes far later.
Coucou, does this mean I SMS her and says, "That was great meeting you last night. I must say that you were very beautiful last night." ???
Puspawarna
24-08-11, 10:41
How do you know she is the one for you ??? silly statement till you know her better.
Stop being a wuss - women hate that !!! grow a pair and phone her!!! .
What you think she gave you her number for ???
She wants to be called -coffee and lunch are for associates and friends, dinner is always much more intimate, take her to a nice restaurant. Make sure you pick her up and make sure you drop her of at the end of the night - dont just chuck her in a cab. If the dinner goes well suggest moving on for a couple of drinks but dont get drunk and dont let her get drunk you will both regret it - expect a small kiss or exchange of affection like a hug or holding hands - dont try to bang her on the first date.
This is excellent advice.
Cut the high school cat chase and tell her you want to jump her bones, and see what her reaction is... if it is "meant to be" then there should be no rejection to your statement.
There are million more fish in the sea that may be "the one for you"...
psha, forget sms. Give her a call and say, hey it was great to meet you last night. Are you free this Saturday for a lovely dinner with me?
Done. If she says no, ask for another time. You'll get a feel if she's just declining you or just the timing. A "I'm doing my dog's hair" is a sure fire tell that she's declining you. A "I have to pick up my parents at the airport and then take them to dinner after not seeing them for months, can we do it another time" is a hint that she's declining the timing, and want you to pick another time.
Hey Scooter! He say he want impress her, not marry her!!
We still don't know about his intention? long or short term???
Someone who say he find the "right one" with someone that he barely know nothing about... don't sound like something very serious!
My interpretation of "how impress her" is: how put her in my bed!
Am I wrong???
Puspa beats me to it. I also wanted to say the same. :)
Give her a call, Sayap. I'd be hoping to have a call after a phone number exchanged.
Puspawarna
24-08-11, 10:49
Coucou, does this mean I SMS her and says, "That was great meeting you last night. I must say that you were very beautiful last night." ???
I'd be interested to hear whether other females would be charmed by that or not. As for myself, I would NOT like that at all. Back in my dating days, I much preferred guys who made it clear they were interested in me because we had something in common - a mutual love of animation, a fondness for hiking, a passion for Greek food, whatever. Sure, it's nice to be thought of as beautiful. But in my experience, the ones who pursued me only because they liked the way I looked were not worth my time. Tell her she's beautiful after it is clear you adore her sparkling personality or admire her intellect or something else that isn't shallow.
If other females disagree, however, don't listen to me.
How do you know she is the one for you ??? silly statement till you know her better.
Stop being a wuss - women hate that !!! grow a pair and phone her!!! .
What you think she gave you her number for ???
She wants to be called -coffee and lunch are for associates and friends, dinner is always much more intimate, take her to a nice restaurant. Make sure you pick her up and make sure you drop her of at the end of the night - dont just chuck her in a cab. If the dinner goes well suggest moving on for a couple of drinks but dont get drunk and dont let her get drunk you will both regret it - expect a small kiss or exchange of affection like a hug or holding hands - dont try to bang her on the first date.Sco
Scooter, we talked last night (face to face), and I think we have lots of things in common about hobbies, etc. It's true that I do not know about her everything but that will come on next meeting.
About giving her phone number... I have met many ladies before and they all gave me their phone numbers. But some of them did not respond to me and failed to go out with me. So giving phone number does not mean she is interested. Girls are very complicated :confused2:
let's go by this old adage: "if you didn't ask, the answer is always no"
Cut the high school cat chase and tell her you want to jump her bones, and see what her reaction is... if it is "meant to be" then there should be no rejection to your statement.
There are million more fish in the sea that may be "the one for you"...
Hahahaa...I wish I could do that. I heard this many times: Yes, it is true that there are millions of fish in the sea, but there are only a few that have something in common. If I lose this, finding another one like this is not that easy :fish:
ponyexpress
24-08-11, 12:52
Do not try hard to impress her. Just go slowly and easy. Having something in common is a good start but it does not necessarily lead to another level. Most of the time, wits work well to impress women. Call her and ask her out, if she refuses, then post a thread of drink invitation here. Surely, there will be some people here who are happy shout you a gallon of absinthe! Good luck.
cheesecake
24-08-11, 17:29
I'd be interested to hear whether other females would be charmed by that or not. As for myself, I would NOT like that at all. Back in my dating days, I much preferred guys who made it clear they were interested in me because we had something in common - a mutual love of animation, a fondness for hiking, a passion for Greek food, whatever. Sure, it's nice to be thought of as beautiful. But in my experience, the ones who pursued me only because they liked the way I looked were not worth my time. Tell her she's beautiful after it is clear you adore her sparkling personality or admire her intellect or something else that isn't shallow.
If other females disagree, however, don't listen to me.
I agree. But I don't mind being told that i was beautiful :)
dont just chuck her in a cab.
And for God sake don't mention 'taxi money'.
Pak Gondrong
24-08-11, 17:45
How old is she and also how old are you? different ages different tricks ;)
El_Goretto
24-08-11, 17:51
Drop the "you are beautiful" BS.
Just like Puspa said, something along the line of "It was great meeting you last night. I would love to get to know you better, would you like to join me for dinner some time?" Just be casual and avoid the cheesiness. The simple fact that you are asking her out will let her know that you are attracted to her.
And don't be scared that she will say "no". If you want to be 100% sure of the outcome, just don't ask her out, this way you'll know 100% that you will not date her.
Coucou, does this mean I SMS her and says, "That was great meeting you last night. I must say that you were very beautiful last night." ???
I will feel comfortable to read the last sentence. Sounds too...nakal?
But yeah text/call will be nice the day after the meeting. Dont wait too long though (based on experience). She might think you have less interest on her. I would say 1-3days is fine..
Goodluck sayap!
I will feel comfortable to read the last sentence. Sounds too...nakal?
But yeah text/call will be nice the day after the meeting. Dont wait too long though (based on experience). She might think you have less interest on her. I would say 1-3days is fine..
Goodluck sayap!
I meant uncomfortable..but PRose was right. Different age diff tricks!
Sco
Scooter, we talked last night (face to face), and I think we have lots of things in common about hobbies, etc. It's true that I do not know about her everything but that will come on next meeting.
About giving her phone number... I have met many ladies before and they all gave me their phone numbers. But some of them did not respond to me and failed to go out with me. So giving phone number does not mean she is interested. Girls are very complicated :confused2:
I'm not really a veteran in this, but it sounds to me you're waiting for the green light to turn red.... :confused2:
How old is she and also how old are you? different ages different tricks ;)
Good question. It's kinda rude to ask how old she is on first meeting :becky:. I am 30
I will feel comfortable to read the last sentence. Sounds too...nakal?
But yeah text/call will be nice the day after the meeting. Dont wait too long though (based on experience). She might think you have less interest on her. I would say 1-3days is fine..
Goodluck sayap!
This is what I was looking for. Thanks. great advise !
Drop the "you are beautiful" BS.
Just like Puspa said, something along the line of "It was great meeting you last night. I would love to get to know you better, would you like to join me for dinner some time?" Just be casual and avoid the cheesiness. The simple fact that you are asking her out will let her know that you are attracted to her.
And don't be scared that she will say "no". If you want to be 100% sure of the outcome, just don't ask her out, this way you'll know 100% that you will not date her.
Wow..this is so good.I will use the exact sentence. Thanks !
ponyexpress
24-08-11, 18:49
Wow..this is so good.I will use the exact sentence. Thanks !
So you're gonna use the exact sentence suggested by El_Goretto and say it in English too? Ah...she is an expat!
Wow..this is so good.I will use the exact sentence. Thanks !
You may want to send El_Goretto as an official representant then for the next date. He may sound more natural. Just be YOU for god sake. I am sure you have plenty of talent and will find a natural way to impress her. You don't need to fake it and live it in your head before it happens. Take it easy.
El_Goretto
24-08-11, 22:12
You may want to send El_Goretto as an official representant then for the next date.
I charge by the hour :)
MARS and VENUS on A Date by John Gray is a good book, you might wanna look that one up, and read it... (maybe learn from it).. specially if you think she's the one for ya'... :becky:
:rofl:
So you're gonna use the exact sentence suggested by El_Goretto and say it in English too? Ah...she is an expat!
Yes, in English and Yes, she is an expat
MARS and VENUS on A Date by John Gray is a good book, you might wanna look that one up, and read it... (maybe learn from it).. specially if you think she's the one for ya'... :becky:
:rofl:
I bought this book few years ago.. First time I read it on my bed after taking shower. By the time I reached second page, I felt a sleep already and never finished the book since then :roll:
I bought this book few years ago.. First time I read it on my bed after taking shower. By the time I reached second page, I felt a sleep already and never finished the book since then :roll:
Perhaps you should finish it?
ponyexpress
25-08-11, 10:16
Yes, in English and Yes, she is an expat
Ah...as I suspected.
In that case, you should be straight forward with your lines. I reckon you should ask her to go out for a coffee pretty soon. "It was great meeting you the other night. I am wondering if you'd like to meet for a coffee". If it works, then you ask her out for dinner. You probably need to tell her as you are about to leave. "Again, it's really lovely talking to you. Maybe we should do dinner next week, if that suits you". But it all depends on how does the coffee date go. If it is suicidally dull, then forget all about it.
Hombre de Maiz
25-08-11, 10:30
Don't invite her for coffe or dinner as the main activity. Sounds so contrived and kaku. Invite her out for outings or events. After the outing and event, you take her out for dinner casually. Don't make definite plans for seeing her again. Leave her thinking and wondering. When you contact her again in a couple of days, she'll be on her back foot and more amenable. Use the Russian tactic. Draw her in, give her a false sense of security, draw her in, and then pounce!
A little advice, Sayap..
Don't be too pushy. Give her some relax time when you meet and dont push her to answer your questions although you have so many questions to ask about her. One by one, let it flow and take it easy. Play cool, girls more interested in you if you are not showing your interest on her too obvious. Santai aja.
ponyexpress
25-08-11, 10:35
Hombre's idea sounds interesting. I took a girl once to see SEXPO Australia. It all went well until she bought a vibrator.
Oh, and pay for the expenses. Whether its coffee, dinner, movies, ticket for the Sexpo.., well.., unless if she wants to buy a vibrator..
Hombre de Maiz
25-08-11, 10:56
Does that include her transportation by taxi back home?
Does that include her transportation by taxi back home?
If he owns a vehicle and can arrange a pick up and take her back home it would be ideal. But if not, take her home not just chuck her in a cab like Scooter said, moreover give her a taxi money. I would rather offended if a guy who just had a date with me giving me some money for the cab. Apa ..??
bow chicka wow wow
25-08-11, 11:37
if you feel the need to impress her, then you're obviously not the one for her.
If he owns a vehicle and can arrange a pick up and take her back home it would be ideal. But if not, take her home not just chuck her in a cab like Scooter said, moreover give her a taxi money. I would rather offended if a guy who just had a date with me giving me some money for the cab. Apa ..??
Usual Hombre, making connections to another thread. :-D
Call her and be yourself.
Don't over think it, don't fake it. Have fun and enjoy yourself while you're out with your date.
Sorry for my misunderstood
I was thinking you are an expat who want impress an Indonesian girl
So... you are an Indonesian trying to impress a bule??
Anyway, I stick to my first advise, forget about trying to impress
You will never be yourself if you follow any advise step by step
Read all and take them as advise for create your own way.
There will never be "a way to" who will work for everyone in matter of relation.
If you want good advise... give more personal information about your situation.
Other than that, all advise say here mean nothing to you, as nobody have relevant information about your situation.
Alia... I didn't know you as shy on sex matter!!!!
In this situation (that I'm interested in the girl), I will run to pay the vibe, as we will need to try it together later :) :)
In reverse situation... RUN AWAY
I will always give all help I can for my partner can reach... heuuu... does this forum is 18+??
To any men: If you are afraid of vibe, question yourself!!!!
:) keep your mind open and enjoy life :)
But but ...., this is the first date we are talking about, Phil..! (assuming this is the first and not counting the very first time OP said he met the girl face to face, and has been thinking she is the one for him)
Would be odd if let's say, we're on the Sexpo and you pay for the vibe, dont you think ? And why would I (the girl) needs to buy one if there is a real one around ?? Perhaps it'll be needed later on, but not from the first date I say. Personal touch is preferred..
El_Goretto
25-08-11, 16:03
Yes, in English and Yes, she is an expat
Is she German (http://www.livinginindonesiaforum.org/showthread.php/17748-German-Restaurant)?
Ja..give more information about your situation brew... :tongue:
ponyexpress
25-08-11, 16:16
Is she German (http://www.livinginindonesiaforum.org/showthread.php/17748-German-Restaurant)?
Ha...ha...ha I have the same thought about this too!
Looks like she wasn't the one ... :whistle:
Sayap
''You know.. not only girls who knows how to party, club, etc. hehehe. I am from Surabaya, but unfortunately I am a male (31 yrs). Knows English very well and very open minded. Let me know if you are interested to meet up.''
http://www.livinginindonesiaforum.org/showthread.php/12944-looking-for-a-female-friend
ponyexpress
25-08-11, 16:54
Looks like she wasn't the one ... :whistle:
Sayap
''You know.. not only girls who knows how to party, club, etc. hehehe. I am from Surabaya, but unfortunately I am a male (31 yrs). Knows English very well and very open minded. Let me know if you are interested to meet up.''
http://www.livinginindonesiaforum.org/showthread.php/12944-looking-for-a-female-friend
She seems to be in Plan A while the other girl is his plan B.
Heh heh...She's always the one when I'm with her :-D
Sorry for my misunderstood
I was thinking you are an expat who want impress an Indonesian girl
So... you are an Indonesian trying to impress a bule??
Anyway, I stick to my first advise, forget about trying to impress
You will never be yourself if you follow any advise step by step
Read all and take them as advise for create your own way.
There will never be "a way to" who will work for everyone in matter of relation.
If you want good advise... give more personal information about your situation.
Other than that, all advise say here mean nothing to you, as nobody have relevant information about your situation.
I said she was an expat, and yes we communicate in English...but didn't say she was a bule :D
She seems to be in Plan A while the other girl is his plan B.
Hey I was just saying that I was from Surabaya :-D and this one is probably not possible :-P
OK..I called but she didn't pick up. So I guess she gave me her number so just to be nice with me that night :-P Should I move on calling her again tomorrow?
Sorry for my misunderstood
I was thinking you are an expat who want impress an Indonesian girl
So... you are an Indonesian trying to impress a bule??
Anyway, I stick to my first advise, forget about trying to impress
You will never be yourself if you follow any advise step by step
Read all and take them as advise for create your own way.
There will never be "a way to" who will work for everyone in matter of relation.
If you want good advise... give more personal information about your situation.
Other than that, all advise say here mean nothing to you, as nobody have relevant information about your situation.
This might be a good topic to discuss. When I lived overseas, I dated few bules and it seemed not too difficult to ask them out. But here I heard rumors that Indonesian guys are having hard times dating female bules.. not too sure why. Maybe females here can give inputs.
As far as for me now, I am not so looking for bules, any girls are welcome if we have in common. but, it is just damn hard to date any girls here.. mostly because competition.. hahaha :smash:
Where did you learn Russian tactic Hombre ?
Have you tried this tactic and work in Indonesia ...???
Don't invite her for coffe or dinner as the main activity. Sounds so contrived and kaku. Invite her out for outings or events. After the outing and event, you take her out for dinner casually. Don't make definite plans for seeing her again. Leave her thinking and wondering. When you contact her again in a couple of days, she'll be on her back foot and more amenable. Use the Russian tactic. Draw her in, give her a false sense of security, draw her in, and then pounce!
@ Alia... buy a vibe while your first date is already very odd!!!!
Hombre de Maiz
26-08-11, 08:36
Where did you learn Russian tactic Hombre ?
Have you tried this tactic and work in Indonesia ...???
From the Tsars, Stalin and the Red Army. The Russian tactic is particularly devastating here. The fate of the Wehrmacht and Napoleon are testimony to its deadly efficacy.
Remember, "the Glengarry leads are for closers". ABC. Always Be Closing.
Russian tactic might work in Russia in the former USSR countries. But if you apply it to the Russian people who are working living in the industrialized countries, they will kick your ass and then knock you down....
Do not know whether Russian tactic could work in Indonesia
From the Tsars, Stalin and the Red Army. The Russian tactic is particularly devastating here. The fate of the Wehrmacht and Napoleon are testimony to its deadly efficacy.
Remember, "the Glengarry leads are for closers". ABC. Always Be Closing.
Hombre,
This is a typical example of Russian oligarch ladies living in a Western Country
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-458832/Invasion-Russian-gold-diggers.html
You could judge yourself whether the Russian tactic could work here .... ..
From the Tsars, Stalin and the Red Army. The Russian tactic is particularly devastating here. The fate of the Wehrmacht and Napoleon are testimony to its deadly efficacy.
Remember, "the Glengarry leads are for closers". ABC. Always Be Closing.
Pak Gondrong
29-08-11, 17:37
A little advice, Sayap..
Don't be too pushy. Give her some relax time when you meet and dont push her to answer your questions although you have so many questions to ask about her. One by one, let it flow and take it easy. Play cool, girls more interested in you if you are not showing your interest on her too obvious. Santai aja.
nan ren bu huai, nu ren bu ai
Yup exactly, that's what Chinese say; Girls fall in bad boys ;)
Hombre's idea sounds interesting. I took a girl once to see SEXPO Australia. It all went well until she bought a vibrator.
Is there any sexpo in Jakarta? I think none so this not gonna happen, unless he takes her to Singapore with his private jet...
Looks like she wasn't the one ...
http://www.livinginindonesiaforum.org/showthread.php/12944-looking-for-a-female-friend
No she is the one, but which one :)
This is good one which shows that you're not hopelessly fall in love this expat girl and still available to other, meaning that u can still act cool like a playboy.
If she didn't pickup; sms her Sayap, ask her if she remembers you or not, say "I'm the charming guy from party, if u didn't save my number dun worry here is your chance ;-)"
This might be a good topic to discuss. When I lived overseas, I dated few bules and it seemed not too difficult to ask them out. But here I heard rumors that Indonesian guys are having hard times dating female bules.. not too sure why. Maybe females here can give inputs.
As far as for me now, I am not so looking for bules, any girls are welcome if we have in common. but, it is just damn hard to date any girls here.. mostly because competition.. hahaha :smash:
Are you sure you are in Indonesia? I thought most girls aim to get married before 25 there?
nasipecelsby
29-08-11, 22:31
[QUOTE=PRose;188426]nan ren bu huai, nu ren bu ai
Yup exactly, that's what Chinese say; Girls fall in bad boys ;)
Is there any sexpo in Jakarta? I think none so this not gonna happen, unless he takes her to Singapore with his private jet...
No she is the one, but which one :)
This is good one which shows that you're not hopelessly fall in love this expat girl and still available to other, meaning that u can still act cool like a playboy.
If she didn't pickup; sms her Sayap, ask her if she remembers you or not, say "I'm the charming guy from party, if u didn't save my number dun worry here is your chance ;-)"[/QUOTE
Haha... I like this. Thanks :-D
nasipecelsby
29-08-11, 22:33
Are you sure you are in Indonesia? I thought most girls aim to get married before 25 there?
Yes it is true, but it does not mean there is no very competitive competition :-D
Sorry guys, I close the thread and I ban both nasipecelsby and sayap. another case of sock puppeting. Though none of the IPs they have used matches, way too many details lead me to the conclusion that they are one and only one person.
For the record, using two accounts for one person is not authorized by our policy.
Please all, read our Posting Guidelines (http://www.expat.or.id/postingguidelines.html) to have an overview of our policy. If a doubt remain on a particular topic feel free to contact either wm, paman or me to have further explanations.
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