View Full Version : Seeking Female For Serious Relationship
Hi Ladies,
Aging, short, balding man with small pe-nis and no job seeks female counterpart.I imagine her to be 18-40, Grecian statuesque except slimmer, never pregnant, logical and loyal but unsentimental, Spock-like but without the grip, non-psychopathic (vegans ok), mild mannered and able to be left alone for most of the summer while I go racing.
Bonus points for a fetish for travel by motorcycle, knowledge of Nietzsche, aviation, massage, Early Modern philosophy, architecture, cooking, gardening, the evolving world political scene, financial markets, tantric perspectives, hemp cultivation, property tax appeal procedures, general botany, epistemology, existentialism and given to playing the harp nude around the house, unbidden, for more than a half hour, per sitting. Extra bonus for bi- or triligual applicants.It's pointless to seek ideals, but if you're out there, in addition tot he above, and your first name is four syllables then I will propose marriage.Note to those seeking a "marriage of convenience": that's ok but we must "date" for one year. Thank you ladies, and good luck to you in your search!
NOTE: Obviously, those with herpes are politely asked to not respond as I amdisease-free. I will consider making an exception if you are so breath-takingly stunning that I would gladly be infected with whatever you've got (providedit's not fatal. Chronic ok, including hepatitus A/B).
Interested parties are urged to contact me forthwith. If I don't get back to you within one month, I apologize. I will either get to you or I'm justnot interested, no offense intended. Your patience is appreciated. Bye now.
Black Adder
01-01-09, 19:48
^^^You forgot to ask for pics of the applicants........
Please mr. pimpin,
After you have reviewed the 100,000 replies to your advert that meet your exacting profile, please forward to me the 99,999 rejected applicants, with and without photos, as any of those who consider themselves qualified and failed the selection will gladly be offered individual personal one-on-one extended overnight interviews with an equally ageing grey haired wrinkly seeking the answer to eternal youthfulness and happiness.
jennyhonse
04-01-09, 15:18
Ha...ha.... oh please!!!!!
You need to go to the Harmony.com
wakakakakakak
you need hanging around in bali
expatchickinjakarta
09-01-09, 00:40
you sound like my ideal man, although i would need pics to prove you are short, fat and old enough for my needs. Also encouraging to hear your expectations in a partner are not to high. In this country it should be easy for you to find many applicants :) I have never laughed so hard reading a personal add, although if you were being serious then sorry for just admitting i was laughing at you and also sorry for your ever so small penis. Hopefully what you lack in size you make up for in style, creativity and endurance. Good luck with your search and feel free to update us all on the results of this add, no doubt since sarcasm is lost on some here you will get some serious responses. Oh and also glad to hear your willing to bend on the herpes clause, that may be needed in the future. hehehe L
By all means...knock yourself out!!! I agree with "ExpatChick". Definitely keep the Herpes Clause as it may one day prove useful. If I could add a suggestion...There may be a chance that you are overwhelmed by responses to your obvious plea for a 1niter, just it case...you may want to add a stipulation that ID's must be provided and authenticity must be corroborated (if you follow get my drift). Be sure to check the integrity as there may be some balding, toothless women wearing disposable diapers, clad in thongs, serenading you while adjusting their push up bra's and lubricating their retainers while polishing their dentures with a warted tongue...all dashing to meet their Prince Charming!!! Until then and your prize is confirmed live in the flesh and not latex/rubber or other; keep it in your pants and try to avoid the zipper!!! I have seen pretty u n f o r g e t t a b l e images during my travels. So stay safe.
Peace...
bj
Ideal you say. Please forward application through the inhouse email service. A pic of me will be made available upon passing stage one of the application process. I dont want to display it here and cause a frenzy of wet panties.
jennyhonse
12-01-09, 19:44
Ideal you say. Please forward application through the inhouse email service. A pic of me will be made available upon passing stage one of the application process. I dont want to display it here and cause a frenzy of wet panties.
BLAH:eek::eek::eek::eek:!!!
Hi Ladies,
Aging, short, balding man with small pe-nis and no job seeks female counterpart.I imagine her to be 18-40, Grecian statuesque except slimmer, never pregnant, logical and loyal but unsentimental, Spock-like but without the grip, non-psychopathic (vegans ok), mild mannered and able to be left alone for most of the summer while I go racing.
Bonus points for a fetish for travel by motorcycle, knowledge of Nietzsche, aviation, massage, Early Modern philosophy, architecture, cooking, gardening, the evolving world political scene, financial markets, tantric perspectives, hemp cultivation, property tax appeal procedures, general botany, epistemology, existentialism and given to playing the harp nude around the house, unbidden, for more than a half hour, per sitting. Extra bonus for bi- or triligual applicants.It's pointless to seek ideals, but if you're out there, in addition tot he above, and your first name is four syllables then I will propose marriage.Note to those seeking a "marriage of convenience": that's ok but we must "date" for one year. Thank you ladies, and good luck to you in your search!
NOTE: Obviously, those with herpes are politely asked to not respond as I amdisease-free. I will consider making an exception if you are so breath-takingly stunning that I would gladly be infected with whatever you've got (providedit's not fatal. Chronic ok, including hepatitus A/B).
Interested parties are urged to contact me forthwith. If I don't get back to you within one month, I apologize. I will either get to you or I'm justnot interested, no offense intended. Your patience is appreciated. Bye now.
hihihihihihihihi......... :D
suddenly slimmer
14-01-09, 11:25
This is personal room, so everyone can feel free to put their ideal person to meet. No need to be judgemental,cynical and mocking other people's post.
Pimpim, wish you good luck to find your ideal mate.
[quote=suddenly slimmer;13647]This is personal room, so everyone can feel free to put their ideal person to meet. No need to be judgemental,cynical and mocking other people's post.
I could only imagine you comment was directed towards me, but my reply was only to heighten the sense of the more than obvious "parody" that exists...No way could that be an honest attempt to find a relationship, I mean it was wayyyyyyyy to well worded!!!!!!:p:p:p
[quote=suddenly slimmer;13647]This is personal room, so everyone can feel free to put their ideal person to meet. No need to be judgemental,cynical and mocking other people's post.
I could only imagine you comment was directed towards me, but my reply was only to heighten the sense of the more than obvious "parody" that exists...No way could that be an honest attempt to find a relationship, I mean it was wayyyyyyyy to well worded!!!!!!:p:p
will see you guys argue at gathering :p :D
[quote=b33j915;13655]
will see you guys argue at gathering :p :D
cute.....:p
you are all over the place, are you a forum fairy????:D
[quote=Ela.K3000;13657]
cute.....:p
you are all over the place, are you a forum fairy????:D
hahahahahaha..... lol
I was hoping that this forum thread would have been finished by now and that PIMPIN has found the woman of his dreams... Gosh will it ever end.:rolleyes:
suddenly slimmer
14-01-09, 11:58
Oppsie B, I didnt refer to you but other's post at the top. Peace Yo! and yeah let's pray together that PIMPIN has found the woman of his dream.
Oppsie B, I didnt refer to you but other's post at the top. Peace Yo! and yeah let's pray together that PIMPIN has found the woman of his dream.
I am Sure b33j915 is a Nice Expat.
I am Sure b33j915 is a Nice Expat.
I'm like a big teddy bear with who possesses an over abundance of humor!!!:):D
I seriously doubt that Pimpin will meet his mate, neither here or the Pearly Gates!!! Better search for the ummmmmm...
1) Fountain of Youth
2) El Dorado
3) Alantis
and my personal favorite...
4) A leprechaun to lead you to his pot of gold under the rainbow!!!:D
Ela.K3k...u gotta add me as ur friend:p
I'm like a big teddy bear with who possesses an over abundance of humor!!!:D
I seriously doubt that Pimpin will meet his mate, neither here or the Pearly Gates!!! Better search for the ummmmmm...
1) Fountain of Youth
2) El Dorado
3) Alantis
and my personal favorite...
4) A leprechaun to lead you to his pot of gold under the rainbow!!!:D
Ela.K3k...u gotta add me as ur friend:p
With my Teddy bear i like to cudle it up. but with you.... hmm... :p Expat with abundance of humor of course is one of my favorite to read his posts.
With my Teddy bear i like to cudle it up. but with you.... hmm... :p Expat with abundance of humor of course is one of my favorite to read his posts.
Don't mind cuddl'n either:p:D
Don't mind cuddl'n either:p:D
haha.. lol. b33j915
With my Teddy bear i like to cudle it up. but with you.... hmm... :p Expat with abundance of humor of course is one of my favorite to read his posts.
To my #1 fan...
aka...D' Forum Fairy;):p
Minas~Tirith
15-01-09, 20:49
Hi Ladies,
Aging, short, balding man with small pe-nis and no job seeks female counterpart.I imagine her to be 18-40, Grecian statuesque except slimmer, never pregnant, logical and loyal but unsentimental, Spock-like but without the grip, non-psychopathic (vegans ok), mild mannered and able to be left alone for most of the summer while I go racing. ................................
I think I pass your criteria in all but gender, does that matter?lol......
With my Teddy bear i like to cudle it up. but with you.... hmm... :p Expat with abundance of humour of course is one of my favorite to read his posts.
that's me! :D
that's me! :D
yes and where have you been king? been long time no see..
Hi Ladies,
Aging, short, balding man with small pe-nis and no job seeks female counterpart.I imagine her to be 18-40, Grecian statuesque except slimmer, never pregnant, logical and loyal but unsentimental, Spock-like but without the grip, non-psychopathic (vegans ok), mild mannered and able to be left alone for most of the summer while I go racing.
Bonus points for a fetish for travel by motorcycle, knowledge of Nietzsche, aviation, massage, Early Modern philosophy, architecture, cooking, gardening, the evolving world political scene, financial markets, tantric perspectives, hemp cultivation, property tax appeal procedures, general botany, epistemology, existentialism and given to playing the harp nude around the house, unbidden, for more than a half hour, per sitting. Extra bonus for bi- or triligual applicants.It's pointless to seek ideals, but if you're out there, in addition tot he above, and your first name is four syllables then I will propose marriage.Note to those seeking a "marriage of convenience": that's ok but we must "date" for one year. Thank you ladies, and good luck to you in your search!
NOTE: Obviously, those with herpes are politely asked to not respond as I amdisease-free. I will consider making an exception if you are so breath-takingly stunning that I would gladly be infected with whatever you've got (providedit's not fatal. Chronic ok, including hepatitus A/B).
Interested parties are urged to contact me forthwith. If I don't get back to you within one month, I apologize. I will either get to you or I'm justnot interested, no offense intended. Your patience is appreciated. Bye now.
Sounds like a guy at the passed... Greeneyes but nice or Dutch Guy (on the other site) :p
yet.
So far I've had two applications sent in and she could be a gold mine. Saturday Im going out with her and her five of fifteen friends. They are all apparently hot, fit much of my criteria (accept unfortunately they all have good jobs) and have all been aching for a guy for months. It seems guys like me are hard to come by in Jakarta so I'm in demand. Hopefully I can fill the demand. They don't care if they have a bf but need some good old fashioned loving on occasion.
No herpes promised so may not even need to get infected. I love this country.
Possibly soon to come, a request for guys applications to give an old guy a hand. Keep ya posted.
Nice one, no need to bother getting them tested as they sound pretty legit :P
Hi Ladies,
Aging, short, balding man with small pe-nis and no job seeks female counterpart.I imagine her to be 18-40, Grecian statuesque except slimmer, never pregnant, logical and loyal but unsentimental, Spock-like but without the grip, non-psychopathic (vegans ok), mild mannered and able to be left alone for most of the summer while I go racing.
Bonus points for a fetish for travel by motorcycle, knowledge of Nietzsche, aviation, massage, Early Modern philosophy, architecture, cooking, gardening, the evolving world political scene, financial markets, tantric perspectives, hemp cultivation, property tax appeal procedures, general botany, epistemology, existentialism and given to playing the harp nude around the house, unbidden, for more than a half hour, per sitting. Extra bonus for bi- or triligual applicants.It's pointless to seek ideals, but if you're out there, in addition tot he above, and your first name is four syllables then I will propose marriage.Note to those seeking a "marriage of convenience": that's ok but we must "date" for one year. Thank you ladies, and good luck to you in your search!
NOTE: Obviously, those with herpes are politely asked to not respond as I amdisease-free. I will consider making an exception if you are so breath-takingly stunning that I would gladly be infected with whatever you've got (providedit's not fatal. Chronic ok, including hepatitus A/B).
Interested parties are urged to contact me forthwith. If I don't get back to you within one month, I apologize. I will either get to you or I'm justnot interested, no offense intended. Your patience is appreciated. Bye now.
lol
are you looking for an encyclopedia?:D
yet.
So far I've had two applications sent in and she could be a gold mine. Saturday Im going out with her and her five of fifteen friends. They are all apparently hot, fit much of my criteria (accept unfortunately they all have good jobs) and have all been aching for a guy for months. It seems guys like me are hard to come by in Jakarta so I'm in demand. Hopefully I can fill the demand. They don't care if they have a bf but need some good old fashioned loving on occasion.
No herpes promised so may not even need to get infected. I love this country.
Possibly soon to come, a request for guys applications to give an old guy a hand. Keep ya posted.
Better safe than sorry....
:bounce:
hhhiiiiiihiiiiiiiiiiii
this thread has taken a serious turn...
this thread has taken a serious turn...
Ya, for the worst. It was better off staying dead by the looks of it.
Hi Awsome and Luciam. Wow with all that you wrote you sure look like probable candidates. Would you like to list just a tad more about yourselves and why you think you fit the description of my ideal woman. Not that you need to write too much more for you have really covered most angles with your first contributions here in this thread.
Wow you ladies really look promising to secure my ideal mate. So difficult to choose between the two of you. Hey thanks for sparking so much interest in me. Don't break a fingernail typing too much.
Waw....u always discrib something so detail and clear :)
Love its much, pimp :)
Look like have to ask u for a date :)
Let me know and I will see if and when I can fit you in.
Nice one Pimp...maybe her friend in her picture will go along too. Then their combined age will be equal to yours! :bounce:
Nice one Pimp...maybe her friend in her picture will go along too. Then their combined age will be equal to yours! :bounce:
Thanks for pointing that out.
Isn't it a wonderful thing that many Indonesian women are age blind. Of course when I was first here at the age of 24 it wasn't a consideration but as I have reached middle-age, I've not surprisingly, come to appreciate the joys of that.
Two of them. Nahhh not on the first date. I'm old fashioned that way. As long as we get on the first time, sure, if she is into it, I'd like to have them both. I mean out on a date. :)
Thanks for pointing that out.
Isn't it a wonderful thing that many Indonesian women are age blind. Of course when I was first here at the age of 24 it wasn't a consideration but as I have reached middle-age, I've not surprisingly, come to appreciate the joys of that.
Two of them. Nahhh not on the first date. I'm old fashioned that way. As long as we get on the first time, sure, if she is into it, I'd like to have them both. I mean out on a date. :)
I wouldn't know. I am married and my wife would cut off my...
Good luck with your dates though.
pretty daring about the size :P
Not really Love. I know how to use what I got. Just like to be up front and honest. Care for a toss?
little bit far for a toss..
What size..? Size doesn't matter, isn't it?
pretty daring about the size :P
Yeah sometimes for male, size its "a matter" lol.
Pimp : will catch u bot end of month if u free, cos need goin to out of the city,"medan" for personall case :)))
Missnaughty
11-11-11, 09:31
Hi Ladies,
Aging, short, balding man with small pe-nis and no job seeks female counterpart.I imagine her to be 18-40, Grecian statuesque except slimmer, never pregnant, logical and loyal but unsentimental, Spock-like but without the grip, non-psychopathic (vegans ok), mild mannered and able to be left alone for most of the summer while I go racing.
Bonus points for a fetish for travel by motorcycle, knowledge of Nietzsche, aviation, massage, Early Modern philosophy, architecture, cooking, gardening, the evolving world political scene, financial markets, tantric perspectives, hemp cultivation, property tax appeal procedures, general botany, epistemology, existentialism and given to playing the harp nude around the house, unbidden, for more than a half hour, per sitting. Extra bonus for bi- or triligual applicants.It's pointless to seek ideals, but if you're out there, in addition tot he above, and your first name is four syllables then I will propose marriage.Note to those seeking a "marriage of convenience": that's ok but we must "date" for one year. Thank you ladies, and good luck to you in your search!
NOTE: Obviously, those with herpes are politely asked to not respond as I amdisease-free. I will consider making an exception if you are so breath-takingly stunning that I would gladly be infected with whatever you've got (providedit's not fatal. Chronic ok, including hepatitus A/B).
Interested parties are urged to contact me forthwith. If I don't get back to you within one month, I apologize. I will either get to you or I'm justnot interested, no offense intended. Your patience is appreciated. Bye now.
Is this position still vacant?
Only for those who aren't.
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